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Post by gccwolverine on Sept 28, 2017 11:58:39 GMT -6
we get that 1st 1 all the f***ing time. Grandma had to go to the dr. and momma made me go with them. Why? Why in god's green earth did you have to ride along to the dr. with grandma and momma? Or Billy (brother) had to go to the eye dr. and my mom made me go with them. Did you go to the eye dr.? No.... WTF get me a new job someone please. The doctor visits really get to me. I've never seen so many healthy kids taken to the doctors for a checkup. Plus, we practice from 4-6:30. There are doctors that have office hours after 5? Said the samething in our sunday coaches meeting this week. "You know, these kids have more doctors visits than terminally ill patiesnt dying of brain caner." But it's not just there Dr. visits if someone in the family goes to the Dr. why the {censored} does everyone in the family have to tag along? Is that just a cultural thing I'm missing?
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Post by dytmook on Sept 28, 2017 12:07:26 GMT -6
It's not only players who make excuses. We had a coach have to leave a summer camp program after receiving a text message from his wife. The coach shared the message with us: "Come home now, I'm ovulating!" Nine months later he was a daddy. I would encourage that guy to go. Gotta get the buns.
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Post by 53 on Sept 28, 2017 12:12:11 GMT -6
It's not only players who make excuses. We had a coach have to leave a summer camp program after receiving a text message from his wife. The coach shared the message with us: "Come home now, I'm ovulating!" Nine months later he was a daddy. Still undefeated
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Post by larrymoe on Sept 28, 2017 12:16:22 GMT -6
When they don’t pay for the Drs visits, why not take them all the time?
Besides, if you don’t establish that they have some sort of condition, how are they supposed to draw disability later in life?
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Post by gccwolverine on Sept 28, 2017 12:24:57 GMT -6
When they don’t pay for the Drs visits, why not take them all the time? Besides, if you don’t establish that they have some sort of condition, how are they supposed to draw disability later in life? OK but WHY in heavens {censored} does Timmy have to tag along to the Dr. when little billy has an appointment? Or when grandma has 1?
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Post by fkaboneyard on Sept 28, 2017 12:42:52 GMT -6
Starting RB - "I can't come to practice, my dad is having hemorrhoid surgery and my mom wants me to be there."
Coach - "Are you performing the actual procedure or are you just watching?"
Starting RB - "I don't know, just watching I think."
Coach - "*sigh*"
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Post by larrymoe on Sept 28, 2017 14:10:12 GMT -6
When they don’t pay for the Drs visits, why not take them all the time? Besides, if you don’t establish that they have some sort of condition, how are they supposed to draw disability later in life? OK but WHY in heavens {censored} does Timmy have to tag along to the Dr. when little billy has an appointment? Or when grandma has 1? Because he doesn’t want to practice so he blames mom?
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Post by Defcord on Sept 28, 2017 16:32:38 GMT -6
When they don’t pay for the Drs visits, why not take them all the time? Besides, if you don’t establish that they have some sort of condition, how are they supposed to draw disability later in life? Not everyone can be as happy and as healthy as you!
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Post by Old Pro on Sept 28, 2017 16:42:26 GMT -6
Asst coaches wife texted him right before practice one day. "You have to come home and watch the kids. I had a rough day at work and the girls and I are going out for wine". He went home.
Kid told me once, "I have a 109 degree temperature. Gotta go home". I took him to school nurse because, hey, that's serious stuff. His actual temp was 98.2. I told him "good news! You're actually running a little cool. Suit up!"
Same kid (different day)wanted to go home because he was 'homesick'. I asked when he was home last and he said, "this morning". (Me): where do you live? Kid: "a couple of blocks from here". Told him to get in my truck. We drove to practice and I announced to team he wasn't practicing because he was homesick. You should have heard the flak he took!
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Post by larrymoe on Sept 28, 2017 20:56:54 GMT -6
When they don’t pay for the Drs visits, why not take them all the time? Besides, if you don’t establish that they have some sort of condition, how are they supposed to draw disability later in life? Not everyone can be as happy and as healthy as you! Ok I guess? But, your health is in your own hands.
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Post by fantom on Sept 28, 2017 21:02:12 GMT -6
Not everyone can be as happy and as healthy as you! Ok I guess? But, your health is in your own hands. That's not always true.
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Post by carookie on Sept 28, 2017 23:18:30 GMT -6
Here ya go, an excuse from a ref:
Playing a school for the deaf, they consistently lined up illegally with an extra man in the backfield. They are lined up as such and I point it out to the official on my side and he says, "I have to confer with the other side judge." So they line up like that again and I call time out, I point it out to the officials that they are consistently lining up illegally to which one responds, "I know but we can't explain it to them."
Worst excuse I have ever heard. I tell him that he can explain it to them with a flag, that it sucks that they can't hear but they still have to play by the same rules we do. He didn't like that.
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Post by larrymoe on Sept 29, 2017 8:23:50 GMT -6
Ok I guess? But, your health is in your own hands. That's not always true. I would wager for most 16 year old athletes that would be the case.
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Post by wolverine55 on Sept 29, 2017 8:32:19 GMT -6
It's become an inside joke amongst our coaching staff that for some reason, doctors only keep hours from 9-11 in the morning over the summer (our weightroom hours), yet shift their hours to 3:30-5:30 once fall practice starts...
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Post by Sparty17 on Sept 29, 2017 8:37:27 GMT -6
How about this one, had a kid who didn't play last year and probably would have started this season for us SOMEWHERE in a skill position. He told me; A. he wants to concentrate on basketball because that is where his future is (5'8 and averaged 5 ppg as a sophomore) but the kicker was B. he said he just likes to watch from the stands...what sort of competitive athlete likes to JUST watch from the stands? Change the culture! We had a senior player tell us he wasn't playing because he wanted to focus on being 6th man on the basketball team this year...not a STARTER, but 6th man.
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Post by fshamrock on Sept 29, 2017 8:47:00 GMT -6
Asst coaches wife texted him right before practice one day. "You have to come home and watch the kids. I had a rough day at work and the girls and I are going out for wine". He went home. Kid told me once, "I have a 109 degree temperature. Gotta go home". I took him to school nurse because, hey, that's serious stuff. His actual temp was 98.2. I told him "good news! You're actually running a little cool. Suit up!" Same kid (different day)wanted to go home because he was 'homesick'. I asked when he was home last and he said, "this morning". (Me): where do you live? Kid: "a couple of blocks from here". Told him to get in my truck. We drove to practice and I announced to team he wasn't practicing because he was homesick. You should have heard the flak he took! No judgement, but the first guy will not maintain a coaching career. Most guys I know who get out loved it, but they got tired of taking the flak from the old lady 6 months out of the year
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Post by wolverine55 on Oct 6, 2017 10:43:04 GMT -6
How about this one, had a kid who didn't play last year and probably would have started this season for us SOMEWHERE in a skill position. He told me; A. he wants to concentrate on basketball because that is where his future is (5'8 and averaged 5 ppg as a sophomore) but the kicker was B. he said he just likes to watch from the stands...what sort of competitive athlete likes to JUST watch from the stands? Change the culture! We had a senior player tell us he wasn't playing because he wanted to focus on being 6th man on the basketball team this year...not a STARTER, but 6th man. In our school district, "focusing on another sport" can now be translated into "I'm not going to do chit other than the three months my sport is in season and even then my effort will be minimal at best."
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Post by StraightFlexin on Oct 6, 2017 11:24:43 GMT -6
Had this huge freshman about 6'2, 270 walk past my classroom on the first day. I call him out to class to speak with him. Me: I was wondering if you were interested in playing a sports at the High School Him: "Yeah I was thinking about joining the badminton team" (sounding super feminine) ummmmmmm we didn't have a badminton team Few years later, TODAY I got to see him preform as a member of the dance team at an assembly
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Post by olcoach53 on Oct 6, 2017 11:39:39 GMT -6
Had this huge freshman about 6'2, 270 walk past my classroom on the first day. I call him out to class to speak with him. Me: I was wondering if you were interested in playing a sports at the High School Him: "Yeah I was thinking about joining the badminton team" (sounding super feminine) ummmmmmm we didn't have a badminton team Few years later, TODAY I got to see him preform as a member of the dance team at an assembly We have a 6'3 265 pound trumpet player. At my previous school we had a 6'6 310 pound choir performer. As feminine as the day is long but looked every part of a D1 football player.
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Post by fantom on Oct 6, 2017 12:18:24 GMT -6
Had this huge freshman about 6'2, 270 walk past my classroom on the first day. I call him out to class to speak with him. Me: I was wondering if you were interested in playing a sports at the High School Him: "Yeah I was thinking about joining the badminton team" (sounding super feminine)Hummmmmmm we didn't have a badminton team Few years later, TODAY I got to see him preform as a member of the dance team at an assembly We have a 6'3 265 pound trumpet player. At my previous school we had a 6'6 310 pound choir performer. As feminine as the day is long but looked every part of a D1 football player. Drives you nuts, doesn't it? We had a guy quit the band to play football. About 6'4" and 280. In the first on two practices that he attended he was raw but nobody could move him. The next day I was walking out to practice behind him while the band was practicing. His face lit up and he stared transfixed on the band all the way to the field. I thought then that he was done and I was right.
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Post by olcoach53 on Oct 6, 2017 12:49:37 GMT -6
We have a 6'3 265 pound trumpet player. At my previous school we had a 6'6 310 pound choir performer. As feminine as the day is long but looked every part of a D1 football player. Drives you nuts, doesn't it? We had a guy quit the band to play football. About 6'4" and 280. In the first on two practices that he attended he was raw but nobody could move him. The next day I was walking out to practice behind him while the band was practicing. His face lit up and he stared transfixed on the band all the way to the field. I thought then that he was done and I was right. Absolutely. I maintain that if I could have coached the 6'6 kid he could have been great. The trumpet player is only a sophomore so I haven't given up hope on him just yet. When did band become the end all be all for these kids
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Post by irishdog on Oct 6, 2017 12:50:53 GMT -6
Starting RB comes late to practice huffing and puffing. Looked like he had been through a war. Asked him why he was late. "Coach...my homies got in trouble after school so I ran to help them out, and ran back to the locker room, and ran out here as fast as I could. Do you still need me to run?"
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Post by wingtol on Oct 6, 2017 12:53:13 GMT -6
Drives you nuts, doesn't it? We had a guy quit the band to play football. About 6'4" and 280. In the first on two practices that he attended he was raw but nobody could move him. The next day I was walking out to practice behind him while the band was practicing. His face lit up and he stared transfixed on the band all the way to the field. I thought then that he was done and I was right. Absolutely. I maintain that if I could have coached the 6'6 kid he could have been great. The trumpet player is only a sophomore so I haven't given up hope on him just yet. When did band become the end all be all for these kids Our first year where we are now we actually had a kid quit the band to play football! was about 6'3 280. Dominated both sides of the ball. If he had played all four years would have been a nice college prospect. Went D2 and just didn't quite get it, had he played more in HS I think he would have been better off. So yes unicorns do exist!
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Post by carookie on Oct 6, 2017 13:04:11 GMT -6
Had this huge freshman about 6'2, 270 walk past my classroom on the first day. I call him out to class to speak with him. Me: I was wondering if you were interested in playing a sports at the High School Him: "Yeah I was thinking about joining the badminton team" (sounding super feminine) ummmmmmm we didn't have a badminton team Few years later, TODAY I got to see him preform as a member of the dance team at an assembly I played with a kid in HS; 6'8" 350 (no exaggeration) who missed the halftime now and then to perform in musical numbers as he was part of several school musicals. The only one I remember catching the end of was him singing Aladdin's part in "A Whole New World".
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Post by fshamrock on Oct 6, 2017 13:24:18 GMT -6
It goes back to that thing that we all know is undefeated
turns out in this era you can get a decent girlfriend whether you're on the football team or not. Used to be everybody played to impress the girl in chemistry class, I know I did...if not for girls I might have made a hell of an othello in that year's production, maybe I'd be teaching theater now and going home at 3:30 every day
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Post by Old Pro on Oct 6, 2017 23:15:26 GMT -6
Had a kid come out his junior year. 6'3" 280 but very soft. Trombone player in band. Never played before. Fancied himself a 3 pt shooter in hoops until he got cut as a soph. Smart, so he learned plays fast in the summer. First day of pads goes one on one with a returning letterman who was kinda sketchy but tough as hell. On the snap count he never moved before tough guy clocked him. Knocked him arse over tea cart. At the end of the period he was standing away by himself. I checked on him and he was sobbing. " I don't like this! I'm gonna quit!" I was dumbfounded and responded, "Hey you can't quit! Youre not a wussy!" To which he responded! " Yes I Am!" He finished the season but went back to the trombone for his senior year.
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famar
Sophomore Member
Looking to learn as much as I can from this site and all of the coaches here.
Posts: 208
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Post by famar on Oct 6, 2017 23:38:10 GMT -6
18 years in and I'm back coaching Freshman football and hearing all kinds of great excuses:
Kd on our team goes to a performing arts school in our district and has to ride his bike to practice, he gets there about 15 minutes late every day but we know that he has no other way of getting there. Shows up Monday as practice is wrapping up, tells us a teacher "asked" him to stay after for extra help. The teacher emails and tells us he has a detention because he's playing on his cell phone during class.
Another kid, an absolute space cadet, misses Monday pratice, emails after practice starts that he is sick and won't be at practice. No big deal that he's sick, except that one of our coaches is his math teacher. Coach asks why he didn't tell him during the school day, kid says "I didn't think telling you during the school day was an appropriate time to be talking about football pratice."
We have a kid on our freshman team who has a kid. He has missed several practice because "he needs to spend time with his child."
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Post by CBNIndian on Oct 9, 2017 16:50:01 GMT -6
Had a community coach show up late for practice. Comes out on the field ang hollers for our manager to go get some ice to put on his fish! Had a little talk after practice.
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Post by tippecanoe41 on Oct 9, 2017 22:42:31 GMT -6
I've got a few. and I hate to be the downer of the bunch because I do have plenty of funny ones. But, the most heartbreaking excuse I ever heard was from a Freshman kid. We usually didn't dress Freshmen for varsity games, but because this kid had really worked hard and had been showing that he could do some stuff on special teams for us so that we could get a break for a couple guys who were playing thin varsity positions, he was going to dress and start on, I believe, kickoff and punt. He came to us Thursday and said that there was no way he could be at the game on Friday. We're thinking what the hell and expecting a lame ass excuse. Instead, he tells us that his mom has plans to go out partying with her friends, and he has to stay home to watch his younger brother and sister. I've said it many times, but it's crazy how often people don't realize that as coaches we have to be social workers. It's wild.
Obviously, I've got others like this like I'm sure all of you do.
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Post by tippecanoe41 on Oct 9, 2017 22:47:20 GMT -6
It's not only players who make excuses. We had a coach have to leave a summer camp program after receiving a text message from his wife. The coach shared the message with us: "Come home now, I'm ovulating!" Nine months later he was a daddy. Hey, I'd give him a thumbs up on that one, haha. But I also had a HC one time that I absolutely despised. I have very good reasons that I could explain for about a week's worth of typing. Anyway, I resigned. Heard the next year they lost by like 60 one game. The next day at the typical Saturday morning coach's meeting, the DC (HC's really good friend) just couldn't be there to discuss the "water-through-sieve" defense. And the HC left after only one hour because he had to go be with his family because that was the day that they were going to adopt a dog.
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