Coaches saying "f--k"

I have used it before, but I never berate a kid. Usually it's a "f-me" in disbelief or disgust. I do think no matter how hard you try people mess up- IMO just own it and apologize.

Side note- our DL coach is a huge soft-spoken teddy bear. In 7 years I have never heard him curse on or off the field. Friday night, end of the game a kid from the other team stood on our numbers and taunted the sideline and the crowd for a good 10secs. Refs standing there...didn't say a thing. The DL coach said something about it and the ref flagged coach. He unleashed about 30 "F you"s...everyone was speechless. Needless to say the bear got poked and will be serving a suspension this week. I still can't believe it!

Two weeks ago a DB from the other team turned to our sideline after a pass break up and flipped us a double bird. Not that it necessarily relates to this thread and I'm not blaming his coaches, but Id never seen that before.

Key word in that paragraph was “she”

At my last stop of ten years, we had two different HC's, both were very strict about having no F bomb's by coaches our players. Never really had any issues, never really even thought about the topic to be honest, it was just how the HC wanted it.  


This year I'm at a new school, HC is a longtime friend and often drops the F bomb (never directed "at" a kid) and again, I never really thought much of it, just figured that's how it is at some schools, no big deal. 


Now that I've been here from summer to what is now close to mid-season, I've noticed that our kids feel VERY comfortable casually using the word, weather it's around coaches or when I walk by a group just hanging outside the locker room, it sounds like I'm at a bar with a bunch sailors, truck drivers....or whatever analogy you can think of. Honestly, I can't stand it, the word is just used to loose for my liking and we've even had a penalty on the field because of it. 


Not going to sit here and say I've never said any cus words on the field but when I do, it's few and far between so when it slips, the kids know coach has had enough messing around, goofing off, not paying attentions, etc, etc.

Not trying to virtue signal with this reply, just sharing my observations of the trickle down effect I've seen the last few months. 

We work with teenage, football players. I have a pretty extensive vocabulary. However, sometimes words that you will find in a locker room have greater meaning than using terms that you would find on the SAT. The versatility of the F word is wonderful. It can be used as an adjective, noun, verb, or interjection. I'm not some old guy or anything but didn't everyone grow up having coaches who cussed? Now it shouldn't be overused, but to think that a coach or kids will never say the f word in an intense sport, is a bit of a virtue signal IMO. No here's my caveat that I learned from my mentor, never cuss the kid, only the situation; there's a difference.

***However, about 3 weeks ago we were in a meeting. I was going over a blocking scheme and I screwed up a coaching point as I was getting my words mixed up. I think I said something like "the backside guard is going to trap pull" and a couple kids responded by saying, "you mean skip pull right coach." They were right, I was wrong. Immediately after, I paused, had a stupid look on my face, and responded by saying "f--k you for correcting me," which made the entire room break out in laughter.


There's a time and place IMO

You make assistant coaches bearcrawl, crab walk, and sprint? F**k that!!!! 

yea id tell you to screw yourself if you told me to bearcrawl.
i dont get paid enough to coach to be disrespected like that.

we as a staff do pushups for very bad language, we treat it as a joke more then anything. but...ill walk or throw punches before i let another coach address me like a player.

They're going to find a way to get rid of you some other way eventually anyway.

Do you get to hire or fire coaches? There is absolutely no way I would do bear crawls. You could write me up but I would never do that

I don't particularly mind bear crawls, but if you want me doing crab walks, I'm resigning on the spot.

In reality, I can't imagine treating another adult man like a 15 year old kid you're trying to correct. THAT would piss me off more than the physical activity.

Off topic and it’s a little different, but when I was a young college GA, we had a rule that if a player was late or missed a meeting, they had “boards.” “Boards” involved them pushing a 2x4 across the field and back before practice. Well, one morning I overslept and missed the meeting and so I did boards before practice that day. My superiors didn’t force me to do it, but I felt that if there were rules the players had to follow and a set punishment for said rules, I am not above the law. I did them with a smile on my face and I felt that it reinforced to the players that we weren’t just giving them lip service, we lived what we said. Again, it was definitely a different situation because I was 23 years old coaching kids basically my age, but I still stand by the fact that I did that.

That being said, I wouldn’t make a coach do anything physical as a punishment for swearing, but I am also not a fan of punishment conditioning (a conversation for another thread at another time, I’m sure). If a player can’t stop swearing, they don’t need to be at practice, and I feel the same goes for coaches.

I will give you a little bit of background at each stop because while I personally don't think its appropriate, at some places it is...

Stop #1 (rural small public high school)- no way, @ss, d@mn, sh!t , yes but our Head Coach was a Hall of Famer who ran a tight ship

Stop #2 (rural small public high school)- more lower income, swearing more tolerable, heard it all, coincided with our discipline and win-loss record which was not good

Stop #3 (rural, large public high school of middle-upper class)- d@mn or @ss acceptable but anything else no. 125 kids out for football every year and demanded discipline. Another Hall of Famer at the helm who demanded us talk to them like our own

Stop #4 (rural, small public high school of all ranges- Head Coach)- first Head Coach job, I told our staff they were not allowed to swear. I understood some things slipped out of emotion but I wanted to focuso n discipline because we were taking over a program that was 0-11 with 4 head coaches in 1 year the season prior. My big thing as a head coach was, I cannot defend anything you say that couldn't be said in a classroom (I know the context is different but thats the world we live in)

Stop #5 (suburban/urban- small private school- alma mater)- No swearing allowed. D@mn slips out but generally cussing is not allowed. Most coaches are good about it. Those ones who can't control themselves don't last long. We are the smallest school in conference by at least 250 kids with some schools we play having over 1000 more kids. We are demanding discipline on a daily basis.

In short, I think it depends on what you are demanding and the culture you are coaching in. As a young coach (I started coaching varsity football at 19 years old), I am sure I used it in position meetings but I never wanted to put my head coach or myself in a spot that could be questioned. I am sure there are some places where cussing and the kids chewing after practice is acceptable as long as they work hard and get there chores done. Other places, not so much.

im seeing a trend in this thread (and others that have been around over the years)
some of you see "bad" language (whatever that is) as a sign of discipline issues... which is strange to me since is it REALLY that different if my Linebacker says "get to the F'ing ball!" vs "get to the dang ball!" in practice, talking to his defensive unit as a whole.....how is one less disciplined then the other.

and i do get that this is a cultural thing as well, like society has told us that there are these forbidden words that if said ruin a child's innocence ... and ultimately school admins will hold us to that... so tread lightly.