|
Post by shocktroop34 on Apr 11, 2015 13:43:04 GMT -6
Most of us have heard and remember that infamous line from Rocky. Mickey was on to something when it came to that part of training.
My question is how do you tell or show a player that his girlfriend is seriously affecting his training (mentally, physically, etc.).
I have a player or two that has fallen victim to this. One is always in the hallway arguing with his girl. Another is always late to class walking his girl to class and then showing up late to his.
I will spare you all the numerous other ways that I think their training is being affected (the list could go on forever).
I haven't found an effective way to express this to young guys. I've used examples of other players I've had that have made the same mistake (including yours truly), but they don't seem to really listen.
I guess I was the same way at their age. I'm just trying to help them avoid the mistakes I made. Is it just something time is going to have to teach them?
I'm open to any suggestions.
|
|
|
Post by blb on Apr 11, 2015 14:07:39 GMT -6
Good luck, 34.
You are fighting the biggest motivating factor in the world, and it is still undefeated.
|
|
|
Post by larrymoe on Apr 11, 2015 15:32:52 GMT -6
Good luck, 34. You are fighting the biggest motivating factor in the world, and it is still undefeated. God I hate that saying. That being said, it is very, very rare that today's teenage boy will listen to their coach over other factors. Occasionally they do. It's nice when they realize you're not a complete idiot.
|
|
|
Post by blb on Apr 11, 2015 15:45:18 GMT -6
You hate the "saying," or the truth in the statement?
|
|
|
Post by John Knight on Apr 11, 2015 15:51:21 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by blb on Apr 11, 2015 16:00:59 GMT -6
Not according to Bob Beaman!
Also Joe Namath in his book I can't Wait Until Tomorrow (Because I Get Better Looking Every Day).
No prohibition against women or Johnnie Walker Red.
|
|
|
Post by powerfootball71 on Apr 11, 2015 16:14:20 GMT -6
Seen a sports science not to long ago where they did a bunch of tests on a boxer before and after sex and it was pretty much debunked.
To me of the field issues are delt with the same regardless of cause. Personally think a kid having a Date from time to time is a good confidence thing. Have done a thing for several years where we do extra unit conditioning untell every member of the oline has a date for homecoming.
|
|
|
Post by rsmith627 on Apr 11, 2015 16:20:10 GMT -6
Seen a sports science not to long ago where they did a bunch of tests on a boxer before and after sex and it was pretty much debunked. To me of the field issues are delt with the same regardless of cause. Personally think a kid having a Date from time to time is a good confidence thing. Have done a thing for several years where we do extra unit conditioning untell every member of the oline has a date for homecoming. What if you have a kid that legitimately doesn't want to go, can't afford to go, or is gay and not comfortable being open about it yet? Is it really our job to micromanage every aspect of their lives? Dating is healthy, but come on.
|
|
|
Post by groundchuck on Apr 11, 2015 16:37:48 GMT -6
I believe it was the Chinese philosopher Wu-Men who said can't live with them, can't live without them.
|
|
|
Post by bruinfb on Apr 11, 2015 16:42:23 GMT -6
Seen a sports science not to long ago where they did a bunch of tests on a boxer before and after sex and it was pretty much debunked. To me of the field issues are delt with the same regardless of cause. Personally think a kid having a Date from time to time is a good confidence thing. Have done a thing for several years where we do extra unit conditioning untell every member of the oline has a date for homecoming. Good for confidence as long as she's good looking. I loved the scene in Moneyball when they discussed that having an ugly girl means poor judgement.
|
|
|
Post by wingtol on Apr 11, 2015 16:50:54 GMT -6
I believe it was the Chinese philosopher Wu-Men who said can't live with them, can't live without them. Norm says it best
|
|
|
Post by larrymoe on Apr 11, 2015 17:47:31 GMT -6
You hate the "saying," or the truth in the statement? To a degree, both. I hate the sexist neanderthal tone of the language and also hate that so many people think with the wrong head so much. I don't think that physically having a girlfriend does a single thing to the average athlete. However, today's guys more often than not seem to play the role of the female in the relationship. That leads them too often to become emotional disasters. Seemed like back in the day you'd only have 1 guy every two weeks come to practice messed up because of girlfriend issues. Now it seems to happen 2 or 3 times a week. I have one kid who's dated, broke up with and went back to thesame ggirl going on 5 times now. It's flipping ridiculous.
|
|
|
Post by spos21ram on Apr 11, 2015 17:49:38 GMT -6
You guys are confusing sex with a relationship where the player feels he needs to follow her around like a puppy. Honestly a no strings attached relationship with a girl is great for an athlete. The real relationship is what makes them weak.
|
|
|
Post by spos21ram on Apr 11, 2015 17:52:09 GMT -6
The Olympics are a huge sex fest. You'd be amazed at the number of condoms that are supplied for and used by the athletes.
|
|
|
Post by fantom on Apr 11, 2015 18:02:55 GMT -6
Not according to Bob Beaman!
Also Joe Namath in his book I can't Wait Until Tomorrow (Because I Get Better Looking Every Day).
No prohibition against women or Johnnie Walker Red.
Didn't hurt Max McGee in the Super Bowl.
|
|
|
Post by coachd5085 on Apr 11, 2015 18:03:56 GMT -6
You hate the "saying," or the truth in the statement? To a degree, both. I hate the sexist neanderthal tone of the language .... today's guys more often than not seem to play the role of the female in the relationship. That leads them too often to become emotional disasters.
|
|
|
Post by fantom on Apr 11, 2015 18:11:17 GMT -6
You guys are confusing sex with a relationship where the player feels he needs to follow her around like a puppy. Honestly a no strings attached relationship with a girl is great for an athlete. The real relationship is what makes them weak. The question doesn't really have to do with sex but with guys who get henpecked when they have a girlfriend. They start doing things like missing workouts and being late a lot. If the OP gets a good answer here I'll be happy to see it. I've been doing this for a long time and i don't have one. I've seen that "undefeated" like credited to both Bear Bryant and Frank Howard and that was a lot longer ago than I've been in it. I suspect that the only people who found the solution was the ancient Greeks with their "buddy system".
|
|
|
Post by groundchuck on Apr 11, 2015 18:19:48 GMT -6
Which way is this discussion going?
What I really think is a lot of kids have trouble balancing things. Or they think they can have A or B and really they can have both if they balance their priorities. We had an assistant BBB coach who was old like dirt. He spoke plain too. He told the boys: You are 17. That means you can go to school, then practice, then kiss your girl, go do your homework. Go to bed, get up and go lifting, shower and go to class. And repeat the next day. Do that. Prioritize and you can fit a lot in. When you get out of school you'll wish you had taken my advice.
Good advice from a guy who has been around the block a few times.
|
|
|
Post by blb on Apr 11, 2015 19:34:37 GMT -6
Also Joe Namath in his book I can't Wait Until Tomorrow (Because I Get Better Looking Every Day).
No prohibition against women or Johnnie Walker Red.
Didn't hurt Max McGee in the Super Bowl.
No, but he (and Hornung) had been "training" for years.
|
|
|
Post by John Knight on Apr 11, 2015 20:12:36 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by coachwoodall on Apr 11, 2015 20:26:08 GMT -6
Not that professional athletes and HS athletes will ever be similar but,
The sex act is not a determent to athletic performance.
It's the act of 'chasing' to get to the sex act that is.
|
|
|
Post by coachmonkey on Apr 11, 2015 20:38:25 GMT -6
Most of us have heard and remember that infamous line from Rocky. Mickey was on to something when it came to that part of training. My question is how do you tell or show a player that his girlfriend is seriously affecting his training (mentally, physically, etc.). I have a player or two that has fallen victim to this. One is always in the hallway arguing with his girl. Another is always late to class walking his girl to class and then showing up late to his. I will spare you all the numerous other ways that I think their training is being affected (the list could go on forever). I haven't found an effective way to express this to young guys. I've used examples of other players I've had that have made the same mistake (including yours truly), but they don't seem to really listen. I guess I was the same way at their age. I'm just trying to help them avoid the mistakes I made. Is it just something time is going to have to teach them? I'm open to any suggestions. I'm assuming you mean a toxic relationship, not just sex. I had an athlete in track get into a fight or argument or whatever with his girlfriend (also on the team) before the state finals (they were both running). His performance in the 100 sucked. He got mad after that and his performance went back to normal. I don't tell guys to break up with their girlfriends, but I do tell kids you need to set your goals. People will either do everything to support you, or hinder you. Then the question is how bad do you want to obtain your goals?
|
|
|
Post by mariner42 on Apr 11, 2015 20:41:06 GMT -6
You guys are confusing sex with a relationship where the player feels he needs to follow her around like a puppy. Agreed with this part. I hate seeing the ridiculous number of high school relationships where they completely abandon their friends in order to exclusively spend time with their boy/girlfriend. There's no balance there and it leads to unhealthy results. One of my former boys had a great relationship with a girl and part of what was great about them was that they actually spent time with their friends either on their own or as a couple. Too many drag their partner off to some secluded part of campus to either makeout, fight, fight and then makeout, or just hangout together away from everyone else. As far as reaching as kid who's 'whipped'... I don't know if you can do much, really. Peers mean a lot to them, so maybe having his friends talk to him might get through, but there's a powerful veil over his eyes. Hormones are a motherf*cker...
|
|
|
Post by coachbdud on Apr 11, 2015 21:04:31 GMT -6
Vajay has ruined more athletes than any drug or injury
I typically tell the kids that the girls in college are way better looking, and that if you're a D1 player you get lots of opportunities for 2 at the same time
|
|
|
Post by bleefb on Apr 11, 2015 22:08:53 GMT -6
One of the older coaches on the staff when I first started coaching back in the day used to say it was OK if they had a girlfriend during the season, and OK if they didn't. It was if that status changed that they became "More useless than t*ts on a boar." I laughed at the time, but it's been proven true many times over the years.
|
|
|
Post by coachbdud on Apr 11, 2015 22:56:21 GMT -6
I will say at my school there are 2 kinds of players who are able to pull off the gf thing while playing football at a high level
1. the miggity miggity miggity miggity mack daddy - will plow anything with a hole, puts no effort/thought/time into any of the girls because he doesnt want to be with any he just wants sex... not a problem
2. dating an athlete/cheerleader... typically these girls are busy after school with their own practice so the boys are not missing stuff (workouts) to go see their girl... our cheer team is pretty much year round so i dont have to worry about a player missing something to go spend time with his cheer gf, cuz she has practice too
the rest tend to date losers who actively try to drag them down
I will say a funny story where a gf actually helped us lol, 3 years ago we had a pretty good RB, utterly controlled by his gf, this girl spoke to him as if she were his mother... one day right as we are boarding the bus for an away game (we are 4-0, our opponent was 4-0, big game) they get into this HUGE fight in the parking lot... screaming at each other, cussing each other out the kid is visibly not in it in pre game warm ups... HC and I are talking, thinking we are screwed, he is all sad and going to play terrible
his best game of the year, 200 something yards, almost all just off his physical running because the rest of the team didnt play very well... he pretty much put the team on his back and was running people over/dragging them for yards all game. An hour before the game he is in the locker room asking me if he should even play.
|
|
|
Post by pvogel on Apr 11, 2015 23:27:19 GMT -6
"I've seen it end more careers than any injury". Heard that. Seen it. Believe it.
I was about to tell a story about a player throwing his career away because of a bad influence gf but it pained me so much to write it that i didn't finish typing the story
|
|
|
Post by fantom on Apr 11, 2015 23:30:55 GMT -6
People don't think about the stuff that coaches have to deal with besides calling plays. It reminds me of this:
|
|
|
Post by pvogel on Apr 11, 2015 23:36:36 GMT -6
LOL Bull Durham and Major League crack me up. Baseball is fun. Football happens so fast and theres so few opportunities & everything is so serious. But baseball has so much time for random stuff like that nonsense.
Sports psyche. Most important thing to coaching IMO
|
|
|
Post by John Knight on Apr 12, 2015 5:19:55 GMT -6
Fantom even though your video clip was completely off topic, I gave it a thumbs up! LOL!!!
|
|