pal
Freshmen Member
Posts: 73
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 13:24:30 GMT -6
Post by pal on Dec 12, 2007 13:24:30 GMT -6
how many coaches on here are just on here to talk themselves up or inflate their egos?
Be truthful, I am here to learn.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 13:37:26 GMT -6
Post by tog on Dec 12, 2007 13:37:26 GMT -6
no names please
but this is fair to discuss
not just here, but anywhere i would add?
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 13:43:15 GMT -6
Post by fbdoc on Dec 12, 2007 13:43:15 GMT -6
Wow - don't know what kind of answers this one will get. I really enjoy this board - it's been incredibly helpful to me during the time I've been a member. There is no question about me having an ego - I do! But I try to keep it under control and not come off as my way is the best or only way. Can't really say I've ever noticed anyone on the board getting too far out of control - maybe some of those Double Wingers occasionally
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pal
Freshmen Member
Posts: 73
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 13:53:09 GMT -6
Post by pal on Dec 12, 2007 13:53:09 GMT -6
We all have egos..come on now you have to have one to coach. But I can't stand the "i have an opinion on everything"..how does this happen? I know my system, but I am learning more about the rest of the game.
That is why I love this board...it has great knowledge about the game
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 13:55:24 GMT -6
Post by saintrad on Dec 12, 2007 13:55:24 GMT -6
egos are like noses: we all have them and they stink
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 14:00:26 GMT -6
Post by amikell on Dec 12, 2007 14:00:26 GMT -6
nothing wrong with having an opinion on everything, but you have to be open to change that opinion. imho, if you frequent this board, you're willing to learn/change at least a little. in terms of ego, yeah I have one. I coach special teams, and this year I was very cocky about our KO return team. I was suprised that teams still kicked deep to us. in reference to that, i think part of that success was schematice, but if we didn't have returners that were great at trusting and following their blockers, then we would have been avg at best. what do you think drives egos? is it success that breeds egos (big egos) or is it simply part our nature as coaches to think we have all the answers.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 14:02:38 GMT -6
Post by coachjd on Dec 12, 2007 14:02:38 GMT -6
I find myself reading a lot more than typing. I used to try and post on most topics that I had any or some knowledge about or was trying to learn. But now there is so much info on this board, I find by time I read through all the post that interest me, its time to shut down.
I would say most coaches have some type of an ego.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 14:06:57 GMT -6
Post by brophy on Dec 12, 2007 14:06:57 GMT -6
I had lunch with Tony Dungy and Howard Mudd. "ego" as an individual is natural. We are men....we are wired to be competitive and are driven to not only succeed, but to create "life" (in His image) = wins ........and dominate. If I make bird houses, I just don't want to make a birdhouse, I want to make the badassiest birdhouse in the universe. If you've ever played competitive team sports at a high level, you soon realize you won't always be the best mofo on the planet....you get humbled.... When you WIN, and you are at home....alone.....(as a player or coach) you soon realize that "W" was nice for a moment...that the echos of the cheers and laughs fade, when you are ALONE it is hollow....hey, despite what I thought, that scoreboard didn't define me.......you soon realize the true glory of that WIN was when it was shared (equally) with your TEAM. you realize the prize isn't really the scoreboard, but everyone else that you toiled with....your "boys", your commrades....that is where the "ego" gets buried for most (good) coaches. I believe that until you experience that (philos) love, you will continue to search for the empty satisfaction of chasing the "perfect win" as a way to justify you as a person. Those that don't find that revelation (IMO) continue to look for ways to prove they are better than others to (subconsciously) prove to THEMSELVES they matter. "ego" as a coach, depending on your staff only goes so far. Some staffs are geared to support yes-men, so you further feed the beast of self-interest. If a staff is about a program development, everyone keeps each other humble because you are all working together. Staffs (IMO) are built off the dynamic of the HC who has either learned the lessons of the previous paragraph or not. What you feed you grow, what you starve you kill.......if all you will listen to is comments that flatter and esteem you, you build a monster of pride. If you only believe the negative, you become a self-defeatist. The healthy option is to take the good with the bad and try to grow into a complete ego/person. I think there are other factors invovled as a coach as well. If you experience success EARLY, you have a propensity to believe it is BECAUSE of you. I've had the pleasure of coaching DI athletes, but I've never kidded myself into believing I created those kids...mom & dad did. If you've never had to bust tail and struggle to win, then by in large, you may not know how to disassociate your personal ego from the team. "ego" on a message board is an interesting dynamic, because somehow opinions / posts suddenly become tied to "identity"....so any statement/post that differs from another can be taken as an assault on that "identity". Then it becomes personal. So simply posting "I like the run game" (for example) could be assumed that I DON'T like the pass game (assumption), so anyone with a differing opinion could take it that if you like the pass game, that I am suggesting you are 'wrong' personally. I'm guilty of that...sometimes I assume too much. I should post less. I assume that every guy that wants to change his system is doing so because he hasn't taken the time to identify WHY things need to change. I assume that guys consumed with changing defensive fronts are fixating on clinic-speak and what looks cool. I've done that, and I assume some folks are making the same mistake.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 14:27:04 GMT -6
Post by senatorblutarsky on Dec 12, 2007 14:27:04 GMT -6
"Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation" - Ben Franklin
One nice thing about the board is that you can reply, read over it, and then decide to not submit anything...realizing that the reply was based on the ego, idiocy or opportunity to agitate.
Like most of us, I have a bit of an ego (which I think I hide fairly well... mostly).
I guess I try to reply if I think that my reply could clarify or be helpful.
I probably should ask more questions than I do, or seek input more often... to be honest though, most of the input I've received has only strengthened my original position... whether or not it was endorsed by others.
It is obvious that there are many different philosophies and personalities on this board... perhaps people we would not seek out for information (for whatever reason) in any other venue. (Which is one of the GREAT benefits of this board).
I've been on this board for a long time... I've seen "ego" presented because people want instant credibility... I probably did that some when I first arrived too... like many, I am not very patient. Joining the board, it is kind of like joining one large staff... some are eager to show "what they can do". Hopefully, I'm over that... I'm content to sit on the golf cart and watch a lot... and chime in if necessary (by what I deem necessary).
There are some definite people who are on this board that I seek out (whether their posts, articles, etc.). To be honest, there are some I've learned to avoid a bit.
By now, I think I have a pretty good handle as to what I can offer (experiences in job situations, certain schemes, certain techniques), but this board really proves that I am the football knowledge equivalent of my screen-name... hang around for 7 years, endorse a toga party, might as well join the ******* peace corps... hope to be a senator someday.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 14:58:34 GMT -6
Post by dubber on Dec 12, 2007 14:58:34 GMT -6
The real egoism is when a person doesn't take the time to read all the posts in a thread and see how the conversation developed......they just read the first post then hit "reply" and give their two cents........that's pretty self-serving imo (and I've been guilty of it)
To me, egotisical behavior is easier to maintain on the internet----it's easier for me to tell airraider his offense is worthless when I don't see his body language or have direct reprisal from such an insensitivy (and ultimately wrong) statement. Plus, the intensity of the reprisal is limited (oooooo, you're going to PM me to death?)
Ever read "The Invisible Man"? It is amazing what a man can do when he doesn't have to look himself in the mirror. The people you interact with are your mirror, and when they are nothing but words, it is easier to be Mr. Egotisitcal Big Balls
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 16:10:39 GMT -6
Post by spreadattack on Dec 12, 2007 16:10:39 GMT -6
Yeah I think a board like this both fosters and breaks down ego. Just about anyone who throws out their ideas (and in particular football coaches) have enough ego to think someone may want to listen. But at the same time the internet and the board is very democratized - if I tell my players what we are going to run, well they are going to run it. Even a HC to his staff. But here, if I say this concept works or that blocking scheme, the next guy is going to say, "why do you do that?" Or "well, that sounds good, but what do you do when they do this?"
So you can't have too big of an ego (or at least you shouldn't) on a board like this where lots of guys have lots of experience. That's what I like about the board, at the end of the day they are just ideas, and they stand or fall on their own merit.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 21:53:53 GMT -6
Post by carookie on Dec 12, 2007 21:53:53 GMT -6
I guess I'll provide a different perspective on this. I'm pretty sure everyone who has posted on this topic has at least 4 times the experience and 10 times the coaching knowledge than I have. I have by far taken more from this board then I could have possibly given. That being said I have a huge ego, and I guess that goes for everything I do; its just the type of person I am. In my college days it manifested itself as me being the guy who felt there was never a girl I couldn't get, or for a while never a guy I couldn't drink under the table. Now, I feel like there isn't a team out there that going into the game we (whoever I'm coaching) couldn't beat.
That being written I'm fairly certain I don't have an ego as far as this board goes. Maybe if I were a 30 year coaching vet with rings all over my fingers I'd play that game; I hope not though. I just always figured that in whatever I do I may be good now, its nothing compared to what I'll be tomorrow
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 22:08:52 GMT -6
Post by Coach Huey on Dec 12, 2007 22:08:52 GMT -6
... whatever I do I may be good now, its nothing compared to what I'll be tomorrow excellent quote. that will go in my "book of quotes"
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 22:26:59 GMT -6
Post by pegleg on Dec 12, 2007 22:26:59 GMT -6
i don't have an ego i'm always right.
seriously, if you don't have an ego, you're probably not a great coach. part of what makes us good at what we do is competetiveness and ego. i think i'm the badest man in every room i walk into, its part of what makes me good at what i do. i wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't for the adreniline rush and the competetive nature of what we do.
that may not be the most pc answer, but its the truth. i also think that if you look real closely at yourself you feel a similar thing. i haven't known any good coaches who weren't egotistical, ultra competetive jerks. and they are my best friends..............so take it for what its worth, love you guys.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 22:36:05 GMT -6
Post by Coach Huey on Dec 12, 2007 22:36:05 GMT -6
think there is a difference between "having an ego" and being confident.
to me, if you are confident you will still portray professionalism and humility. while, someone with an "ego" may not be able to maintain a proper amount of professionalism or stay grounded when in discussions with others (humility).
just my thoughts.
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Ego's
Dec 12, 2007 22:40:35 GMT -6
Post by pegleg on Dec 12, 2007 22:40:35 GMT -6
fair enough huey. i get what you are saying, i'm just saying that we are good at what we do because of our belief in ourselves............call that ego or confidence, your choice.
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Ego's
Dec 13, 2007 6:44:14 GMT -6
Post by coachcb on Dec 13, 2007 6:44:14 GMT -6
think there is a difference between "having an ego" and being confident. to me, if you are confident you will still portray professionalism and humility. while, someone with an "ego" may not be able to maintain a proper amount of professionalism or stay grounded when in discussions with others (humility). just my thoughts. Excellent point Huey. To me, an arrogant person is an individual that is so wrapped up in their point of view that they refuse to listen to other points of view. A self confident person believes in what they do, but also understands that there is a need to get better. When I first started coaching, I had a massive EGO and was an arrogant person with respect to coaching football. Then two things happened; 1. GOT MY A$$ WHOOPED FOR A WHOLE SEASON! 2. Because of that season, I figured I'd better start learning and put my ego aside. I bought books and videos, went to clinics, and picked the brain of every coach I could find. With respect to this board, I do a fair amount of posting, but I also do about twice as much reading.
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Ego's
Dec 13, 2007 14:21:56 GMT -6
Post by brophy on Dec 13, 2007 14:21:56 GMT -6
there is a difference between "pride" and "personal satisfaction". We tend to throw around a lot of general terms that have multiple meanings (which lead to 'holier than thou' posts) to many different people. A successful CEO once said;
"You will never have a perfect day until you do something for someone who can never repay you" [/size][/center] I think that true "coaching" involves a great deal of altruism to be successful. Now, I believe we all strive to give the most and take pride in our work, but where the "ego" (of this thread ) is pertaining to is how much credit do we expect to be recognized for [correct me if I'm wrong]. In my mind, I assume that it is MY JOB to give OUR athletes the best possible care and instruction possible. That isn't something I'm looking to take credit for. It is expected of us, so I don't believe we need to be patted on the back for delivering what people have intrusted us to do. Where the "ego" (as I assume we're talking) comes in, is when folks believe the opposite.
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Ego's
Dec 13, 2007 17:14:34 GMT -6
Post by brophy on Dec 13, 2007 17:14:34 GMT -6
the "ego" of a message board also has this dynamic to work around..
before opening this video, be warned it is not safe for work
.
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Ego's
Dec 13, 2007 17:27:43 GMT -6
Post by coachjoe3 on Dec 13, 2007 17:27:43 GMT -6
the "ego" of a message board also has this dynamic to work around... That's the funniest thing I've seen all week!
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Ego's
Dec 13, 2007 20:02:02 GMT -6
Post by carson101 on Dec 13, 2007 20:02:02 GMT -6
The only ego I have is what I borrow from you guys! Everything else I know is because of this site....Huey & Tog have been a great inspiration...LOL
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nexthc
Junior Member
"The Golden Rule"
Posts: 439
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Ego's
Dec 14, 2007 7:11:36 GMT -6
Post by nexthc on Dec 14, 2007 7:11:36 GMT -6
Check your ego at the door.
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Ego's
Dec 17, 2007 16:11:28 GMT -6
Post by brophy on Dec 17, 2007 16:11:28 GMT -6
Hey, not to ressurect this thread, but maybe in a different vane....... does anyone else get sick of the 'ego' / political element to the profession? Right or wrong, but so many times name-dropping and shiny object philosophies come into play in determining legitimacy and it is just the nature of the industry. I guess the 'drama' associated with the ego-trip sessions really makes me sick in dealing with other coaches....I dunno.....maybe if I were a teacher or something, I'd understand
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Ego's
Dec 17, 2007 17:01:56 GMT -6
Post by coachorr on Dec 17, 2007 17:01:56 GMT -6
One of my greatest worries is that I will reach a point in my career where I have learned so much that I will believe that I cannot be taught anymore. Then I guess it will be time to get out. I love this site, because it is a constant reminder of all that I don't know and it humbles me. One thing that bothers me about posters and you don't see it on here, is how easy it is to take a cheap shot at someone. We have a board in Idaho and I have been posting for over five years on local athletics and people constantly are berrating me for being involved. Normally, I do not lash back, because I am not willing to stoop to their level. I usually just put down my cell number and ask them to call me if they want to call me names. One last thing, to some people it means nothing to be rude from behind a screen name. BUt I say, why not be nice it doesn't cost anything. I guess it is just easier to be a jerk, and that is one thing I appreciate from everyone here, is the level of professionalism (This does not include Brophy).
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Ego's
Dec 18, 2007 8:20:28 GMT -6
Post by revtaz on Dec 18, 2007 8:20:28 GMT -6
I have an ego, but I try not letting it get in the way of football.
Although is it really ego when I am just pumping myself up? I ask because that is mostly what I do. I work really hard to get on the board and learn a whole lot from people who are much smarter than me. I have learned a ton from the people on this board as well as some people that I have worked with over the years.
The ego comes in when you take a little bit of knowledge and abuse that knowledge.
Taz
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Ego's
Dec 18, 2007 13:38:36 GMT -6
Post by gacoach on Dec 18, 2007 13:38:36 GMT -6
What's the saying "no matter how much you know, there's always someone else who knows more". That's always kept me ego in check because I never knew when I'd run into them.
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Ego's
Dec 19, 2007 12:48:37 GMT -6
Post by lawless on Dec 19, 2007 12:48:37 GMT -6
I have less of an ego here than I do in person. I imagine most coaches are the same way. Outside of our staff, (and often not on our staff,) we deal with people, in person, with a far smaller grasp of football. I don't suffer fools easily, and I often get out of boring or meaningless conversations about football with regurgatators (people who spit out exactly what they heard on TV or sport talk radio) by going way over their head with football speak to get them to go away or change the subject. Most men do not want to expose/face the fact they don't know as much about football as they think they do.
But as far as egos go, I don't think I have ever heard a bigger ego than an assistant I had. He had been with the program for years, and felt it belonged to him. When I got the job, he was not crazy about me and fought every step I made, because it was different than what they HAD done. One day after practice he starts jumping me about how this and that are wrong, he has got a problem with everything I am trying to do. I had tried to follow things they had talked about the previous off-season and follow the schedule, but it did not mesh well with me and my style. I was telling him this and he states, "Well, I know my way is right, everything my way is right and no one will EVER change my mind." I lost the desire to work with him right there. Anyone else ever deal with this, getting something like this trown in your face from your asst.? The funny thing is, if he did not have this ego and treat people in this manner, I feel the HC job would have been his.
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Ego's
Dec 20, 2007 18:20:59 GMT -6
Post by kurtbryan on Dec 20, 2007 18:20:59 GMT -6
Some really great stuff here, and thus my take is:
Ego's:
Everybody has one but it comes down to managing how one's Ego is put forth for the world to see.
About that assistant coach you had that knew everything, I HOPE you fired him with light speed swiftness! Nobody needs that headache and it is disruptive to the harmony of your staff and program.
To be blunt, some days one's Ego might be in check as it should be but once in a while upon success of your efforts it might get a tad more fuel.
But it is wise to be gracious in victory and defeat as most of us know. Loving life and sharing the joys and lows with your family, friends and peers is one thing, but being a blowhard know-it-all Egomaniac is another.
God Bless the Internet, it has made Writers of us all!
Kurt
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Ego's
Dec 20, 2007 18:51:55 GMT -6
Post by dsqa on Dec 20, 2007 18:51:55 GMT -6
Ego, the arrogant part, is difficult to identify in yourself. It is present in everything we do, just checked at different levels based on our level of respect for who we are talking to. I just wished I respected more people in my life, then I would be better at humbling myself, I guess that is a chicken/egg - circular argument) The best way I have found to keep the ego in my life in check is to realize that coaching, like teaching, is a matter of the heart. If you truly desire to make a positive impact in a young person's life, then that sincerity will eventually carry the day. It is incumbent on us to continually embrace a growing humility, which isn't as hard now that I am getting older. However, when a person loses touch with their own tendency towards self adulation, thus losing sight of why they "coach" to begin with, then the "checks" come off, and they expose the underbelly of this insidious animal in themselves. The ego is only an effective tool in us, when it functions under authority (an awareness that we will have to answer for what we say - parents, administration, boss, HC, God, etc), within accountability (an intentional, continual pursuit of corrective input from those close to us, that we trust, and who know us), and is saturated in a sincere desire to make a difference, and not a name for itself. My ego is bigger than anyone's on this board,(even that statement is an arrogant one! Actually, I am just saying it as the most arrogant person I am aware of at the present time - should you eclipse me in that honor - all the best to you in your miserable life )and I am sure there are nodding heads and amens all around, but the presence of the things I mentioned above in my life, has made it possible, at least in small part, for me to function in spite of its interference. just my two cents, and Happy Holidays to everyone - It truly has been a great year on this board. What a privilege to participate - many thanks Coach Huey and tog, for your vision of such a place.
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Ego's
Dec 21, 2007 0:44:09 GMT -6
Post by coachorr on Dec 21, 2007 0:44:09 GMT -6
Coach Slack, Thank you for the comments. I believe in it "being of the heart". I want to send a kid your way from our school, over the break I am going to look at your website and talk to his dad about it. BTW, his dad is one of the best DC's I have ever seen at any level. I think his son would benefit from "slf-correcting" with Coach Slack. Thanks
Kurt Bryan, winning gracious is harder to do I think, but such an important aspect of one's character.
Lawless, that was one of the more interesting posts I have hear in a while. So, is he still on your staff.
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