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Post by burtledog on Sept 11, 2007 20:10:31 GMT -6
Yes, and to make up for the lack of time, we give them stuff and use the TV for baby sitting. And who wants to waste quality time on working chores with the kid or disciplining them either preventative/formative or corrective?
Greg
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Post by gunandrun on Sept 12, 2007 10:42:30 GMT -6
Great posts everyone.
Quitting on your team is never an option.
I had a great conversation with a coach I consider a mentor. He calls this type of situation the result of the - sissification of america. Many kids are turning into suburban creme cheese, all soft and mushy, physically and mentally. I played for coaches, back it the early 80's in HS and college, that expected you to do what he instructed, not a resembling behavior, just like he said- no ifs, ands, or buts. I looked to that coach and thought he knew it all. He could do no wrong. Questioning the coach was not an option. Today everyone has opinion and sadlyt many think they have the right to voice their opinion without accepting responsiblity for doing so.
My coaches were great. Questioning them? Are you crazy? They would allow me to hit people without any penalty and I would not need to do an oral report, I was a severe stutterer. All was good in my world. Tackle the man with the ball. Run the ball with authority- "your are going to get tackled why not get your moneys worth". He would praise my efforts when I did as he said. He would let me know when I came up short. I welcomed it, I wanted to get better. My coach would tell me if i deserved praise or correction not my parents.
Sorry for ranting.
Never Quit
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Post by tigercoach on Sept 12, 2007 10:52:19 GMT -6
I think the bottom line is that we as competitive coaches want to win more than the kids do. It is a very selfish time and it seems that in 2007 it is all about me, what I want and if I don't get it I am being discriminated against.
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Post by gacoach on Sept 12, 2007 12:36:49 GMT -6
Great posts everyone. Quitting on your team is never an option. I had a great conversation with a coach I consider a mentor. He calls this type of situation the result of the - sissification of america. Many kids are turning into suburban creme cheese, all soft and mushy, physically and mentally. I played for coaches, back it the early 80's in HS and college, that expected you to do what he instructed, not a resembling behavior, just like he said- no ifs, ands, or buts. I looked to that coach and thought he knew it all. He could do no wrong. Questioning the coach was not an option. Today everyone has opinion and sadlyt many think they have the right to voice their opinion without accepting responsiblity for doing so. My coaches were great. Questioning them? Are you crazy? They would allow me to hit people without any penalty and I would not need to do an oral report, I was a severe stutterer. All was good in my world. Tackle the man with the ball. Run the ball with authority- "your are going to get tackled why not get your moneys worth". He would praise my efforts when I did as he said. He would let me know when I came up short. I welcomed it, I wanted to get better. My coach would tell me if i deserved praise or correction not my parents. Sorry for ranting. Never Quit This is exactly what I grew up with. Also, I never had a "conversation" with them beyond them telling me what they wanted me to do. Today, the players seem not to respect you as their coach as much just because of the dialogue. I don't mind players coming to me if they've got a problem, but I don't want to be their friend. Maybe I'm wrong, but I was scared of my coaches in a distant sort of way and would have never approached them when I played for them. After the years have gone by if I see them I talk to them like adults, but there is still that coach/player relationship distance. |
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Post by ajreaper on Sept 12, 2007 13:10:33 GMT -6
There is a difference between being their "friend" and being friendly. Why should any player fear their coach? That's not needed at all- earn their trust and respect and treat them the way you'd want your son treated by his coach. If my players are "afraid" to approach me or ask for help with a problem I've failed them.
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Post by coachorr on Sept 12, 2007 13:28:37 GMT -6
I think it is more the suburbanization and the XBOX and the "Now Generatioon", than anything else. Yes, we have a label for it, but we classify it with the fact you don't have to be of that religion to suffer from it. We just live in a community that is 90%. The benefit, however, is that the kids for the most part are really great kids, but are a little soft.
I think sometimes the kids do not want it as bad as the coaches do and that is where the real disconnect comes into play.
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Post by cqmiller on Sept 12, 2007 13:31:34 GMT -6
I just moved away from SLC about 2 months ago, and have dealt with that coach in the past...
His personality could be seen as kind of, "@$$holeish", or "mean", but unless he is doing something to put the life/wellness of the players in jeopordy, then the players should not quit on each other.
From what I have heard of the speech after the game in question, our speeches have been EXACTLY the same the last couple of weeks. We had 20 missed tackles in game 1, and 25 in game 2... We let the players know that if they were to do as they were told, and make sure to wrap up, we wouldn't have given up 60 points in 2 games, and win.
In defense of the coach, they are in the biggest classification in Utah, and play against some pretty good teams (Bingham - shutout Kahuku, Alta - beat Clovis East, Skyline - Perenial state champion, Jordan - beat bingham). It's not like they are favored to win any games anyway, even if they did execute better than they are...I just think there is a lot more to the situation than the paper explains.
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Post by coachorr on Sept 12, 2007 23:59:30 GMT -6
Yes Cq, these are some good teams. I have heard that Davis has had at least two or three legit D1 players a year, which to me seems pretty good, when considering we have only had one in 12 years and we are in the largest classification in Idaho.
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Post by gacoach on Sept 13, 2007 10:05:05 GMT -6
There is a difference between being their "friend" and being friendly. Why should any player fear their coach? That's not needed at all- earn their trust and respect and treat them the way you'd want your son treated by his coach. If my players are "afraid" to approach me or ask for help with a problem I've failed them. You're missing my point. I am talking about when I played back in the early 80s' and the difference in the players of today. I am "friendly" to my players and encourage them to talk to me if they have a problem, but that's where it ends. I don't want them to feel so comfortable around me that they feel like they can question me. |
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Post by burtledog on Sept 13, 2007 13:42:44 GMT -6
GACoach:
Great point. Human's and young ones in particular want to bring everyone down to be below them. They have to learn the opposite. Sometimes you are just who you are (a 16 year old being taught or coached/led by an adult), you need to know your place. A little fear/respect is needed. We do not have an over abundance of that in our society now. Comfortable to ask advice or seek help is different than the presumption we normally see in ourselves and our kids.
Greg
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Post by coachorr on Sept 15, 2007 23:30:53 GMT -6
GA Coach,
I know exactly what you mean.
Good points, we are on a mission of wussification of America and it starts with a lack of taking responsibility for one's own actions and secondly on what you are saying, combined with political correctness.
Funny story, we were getting ready for films this morning and I was sitting on a bench outside after doing the defensive stats. Well, at 10:00 all the players come in to watch film after we break it down.
We have one African American on our team. He comes rolling in to films in an Oldsmobile. I ask him, "Dustin, is that a Buick?" and he says, "No coach, it's an Oldsmobile". I respond and say, "Well Dustin you got to get with the program, because from where I am from no self-respecting black man would be seen in anything less than a Cadillac". He agreed.
Point being, is in today's society I think most people would think of me as a racist, however, in my mind I was pointing out a positive aspect of the African American culture as far as I know it, and that is that most of my African American friends are 100% class. This is an enclave culture who dresses better than I do, drives a better car than I do, and in most cases is just all around more classy than I am.
But what is sad, after I said it, I was worried that someone might think I have a problem and this is a problem in our society. We want diversity so bad and we want to be so "unrealistic" about who we are, that we avoid the truth and in many cases we avoid what is positive about our uniqueness.
We are becoming a culture of consumer wussies. We don't make anything (manufacturing), we have little work ethic, and we are always looking for someone to blame.
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