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Post by hlb2 on Nov 7, 2009 20:02:55 GMT -6
Hey guys, I have a question for you. I have taken over my alma mater in my hometown and we are a whopping 1-19 in the 2 years I've been here. I actually replaced my old head coach who retired after being here more than 20 years. We are awful to say the least, very little football talent on this year's team. Last year we had some talent, but no heart whatsoever and we went 0-10. We were defeated by an avg. margin of 34.3 points per game last year. This year, we've been defeated by an average margin of 8.2 points per game. We've been the victim of 2 blowouts this year where as they were all blowouts last year. I felt we had turned a corner until our 2nd blowout came last night, 57-0 to a much bigger and faster team than us, but not 57 points better. Our kids were scared, and they quit during warm-ups. What I'm basically asking is, my old head coach used to tell me "don't take things personal" when the kids don't go out and execute the scheme you came up with, or don't play up to your expectations. How do you do this? I work my a$$ off as I coordinate both O and D and then to have the kids just quit like they did and play scared...how do you not take that personal? I'm still an young head coach, this is just my first gig, and it will probably be my only gig, but I don't understand his advice, and I'd like to. I'd like to make things like Friday night hurt a little less if possible.
Thanks,
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Post by fbdoc on Nov 7, 2009 21:04:30 GMT -6
Your team will never want to win as much as you do. I heard those words as a young head coach and didn't like them ... but its true. YOU have a passion for the game and that is why you became a coach! Not everyone has that passion. As coach you do your best to prepare, motivate, and then send out your players, but they are the ones who have to run, block, and tackle. Don't take it "personal" when they don't perform as you would like them to, but take it as a sign you have a work in progress. Hang in there.
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Post by cc on Nov 7, 2009 21:10:21 GMT -6
Yeah I am in my 14th year and we have had some good teams lately but this years team seemed to quit in a few games. Guys got injured and sick and never seemed to WANT to come back. They just did not want it as much as we did. Had a few, but just did not have the athletes. What amazes me, is that kids don't watch football as much anymore. They are too busy playing other video games. The football IQ just isn't there ,and neither is the toughness, passion, or heart. Really hoping it's just this year, but next year does not look great. I just don't know what to do...
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Post by knight9299 on Nov 7, 2009 21:20:18 GMT -6
A great quote from an ESPN blog sure seems to speak to this:
Iowa's top goal is off the table, but a Big Ten title remains within reach, and linebacker Pat Angerer tried to keep things in perspective.
"It hurts, but we've got two games left," Angerer said. "Worse things could happen. We're not at war. We live in a good country, we're going to school for free, we're living the American dream. We lost a football game. It's pretty small when you think of the big picture."
Losing sucks. If losing didn't bother you then why the heck do what you do. But at the end of the day Angerer is right. It's just a game.
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Post by cc on Nov 7, 2009 22:10:41 GMT -6
Yeah I get that. I just find that my hate for losing drives me more than the joy of winning. Meanwhile, it seems like the players don't seem bothered by losing and get overly inflated egos when they win...
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Post by coachvenom on Nov 7, 2009 22:31:56 GMT -6
Yeah I get that. I just find that my hate for losing drives me more than the joy of winning. Meanwhile, it seems like the players don't seem bothered by losing and get overly inflated egos when they win... are we coaching on the same team? |
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Post by mariner42 on Nov 7, 2009 23:33:31 GMT -6
My interpretation of that phrase: It's not a reflection of you, it's a reflection of them. Don't mistake what you see as a lack of concern for a lack of respect for you as a coach.
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Post by touchdownmaker on Nov 8, 2009 5:01:41 GMT -6
We have all been there, and if you havent, keep coaching long enough and you will get there.
One time One of my CAPTAINS told my assistant coach "I couldnt tackle those guys, they were huge and fast, I just threw other people in the way"- said senior suffered a back injury in that same game.
When you have a situation where your kids believe they are going to get killed....THEY WILL. The real task, and its no easy one, is to find ways to get the kids to focus on peformance, cut down on mistakes, dont miss blocks or tackles, eliminate penalties and fumbles and alignment errors....
I think when you are overmatched all of those errors become magnified because you wont have the playmakers out there to overcome those things...
keep chopping wood coach, hang in there. Heres some motivation for ya, theres a team locally that just advanced to the semi finals....they have lost two games this year after winning just one the previous two seasons....same coach, same kids (the seniors are seeing the benefits of sticking with lifting, speed work and the game). simiolarly, coaches who doubted themselves are seeing the benefits of staying the course.
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Post by coachcb on Nov 8, 2009 7:43:33 GMT -6
I take losing personally, but I also keep it in perspective from a coaching standpoint. The only things that I can control is my coaching and how well I motivate the kids for a game. Now, every win or loss is a learning experience in what I can do better to prepare the kids for the game.
Now, there are times when I have felt that the kids have been as prepared as possible, I have tried to get them fired up, but they still go out and lose. I still re-evaluate, I take it personally, but I accept that there are things that are totally out of my control within a game.
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Post by jpdaley25 on Nov 8, 2009 10:10:58 GMT -6
Don't focus on winning or losing. Focus on doing things right. Set goals they can achieve and really be positive.
We got beat one night 63-0, but we made that team punt twice (once was our goal), had no penalties, had 6 first downs, had 100 yards rushing, and most of the kids didn't give up. We walked out of there like we had won a championship, we ate, and sung songs all the way home.
I would always tell them:
"I don't care about the score. I care about you. I care about what kind of men you are and your going to become. I care about how you are going to feel when you look into the mirror tomorrow - Are you going to like what you see? Or are you going to have to lie to that guy in the mirror - lie to yourself - by making excuses and blaming others?
If you did your best and you're always working to get better and you don't make excuses and blame others, you are a winner. I can't ask for more than that. We've got great kids here and anyone who says otherwise has got me to fight. You boys are a little young and inexperienced- I ain't. If I catch anyone bad mouthing you, or any of you bad mouthing each other, giving that person a bad day will become a priority in my life.
And, I really, really don't care what the newspapers think, what the people at our school think, what the community thinks, or what your parents think. The instrument hasn't yet been invented that can measure how little I care about what they think - because none of them are down here every day going through what you are. I don't give a rat's @ss what any of them think, and neither should you. When it comes to this football team, the only people's opinion you should care about are mine and these coaches. No one else, and when the bad mouthers get to rolling, you challenge them to come down here and put there money where there mouth is, or let me know and I will do it. That usually shuts them up pretty quick.
You are good kids. You are a good football team. You keep working and doing things right and believing and you will be successfull. I guarantee it!"
I gave that speech, or a version of it, every day for three years. It took us that long to turn the corner.
Hope this helps!
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Post by justryn2 on Nov 8, 2009 10:46:05 GMT -6
Thanks jpdaley, that was a great speech. I wish I had seen it a bit earlier this season. We went 0'fer this year; the first time ever I've coached a team that didn't win a game. I actually did say some of what you posted above but I probably could have said more.
I also felt that my players were giving up on themselves too early in most games. We really did not physically match up well with the teams in our league this year but I hated to see the kids quit on themselves. I started making practice much tougher. We did a lot more conditioning on the premise that, it might not make a difference this year but will help next year and the year after that. We spent less time on schemes and more time on fundamentals.
Overall, my approach became, "the harder they work the harder it will be for them to quit." Practice was about going all out from start to finish, just like I wanted them to do in games. And even though we made practices tough, we always ended with something fun and competitive for the last 10 or 15 minutes.
It seemed to make a difference. Our final three games of the season were very competitive. We didn't win but we didn't quit either. My team played all out until the final play and they felt good about themselves. I still hate to lose and I will always want my players to hate losing as much as I do. However, I know that's not reality. There are going to be teams and seasons where you just don't have the horses you need to compete. Do the best you can with what you have and, if you don't want them to give up on themselves then you can never give up on them.
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Post by phantom on Nov 8, 2009 10:46:14 GMT -6
When a bad season ends or you lose in the playoffs it's going to hurt. You put a lot of emotion into this and it's normal for it to hurt. The advice to not take it personally is right in the big picture but you need to acknowledge that there are feelings involved. Personally, outside of the classroom (teaching WAS my real job. I resolved early in my career to never let football interfere with the classroom) I'm a waste for a week after we end the season with a loss. During the season we don't have the luxury of moping over a loss. When it's over it hits like a ton of bricks.
It's similar to the grieving process. Go ahead and mourn. It's healthy. This is important, though- DO NOT MAKE CRITICAL DECISIONS DURING THIS TIME. You'll be acting emotionally. That's what your old boss was talking about. After the emotion subsides evaluate. What do you need to improve as coaches?
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Post by hlb2 on Nov 8, 2009 15:27:23 GMT -6
Phantom, I read this as I was writing my letter of resignation, and you are right. I'm going to put it away for now, and evaluate when things cool some. Thank you.
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Post by airman on Nov 8, 2009 15:50:16 GMT -6
4 laws of success
1. be impeccable in your word
2. never take anything personal. it is about them and not you.
3. never make assumptions make an ass out of U and Uption
4. always do your best.
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Post by hlb2 on Nov 8, 2009 16:21:05 GMT -6
4 laws of success 1. be impeccable in your word 2. never take anything personal. it is about them and not you. 3. never make assumptions make an {censored} out of U and Uption 4. always do your best. Funny how nobody blames the kids, or if you blame the kids you are a terrible coach, yet everything is your fault. Very funny profession we're in. |
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Post by airman on Nov 8, 2009 16:52:45 GMT -6
Friday nights, Saturday afternoons and Sunday afternoons are exams. the teams that win studied/prepared better during the week.
Blame does not get a person anywhere and neither does complaining. we accepted a position of leadership so therefore we are held to a different standard.
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Post by fbdoc on Nov 8, 2009 17:16:40 GMT -6
At my previous stop, we started at 1-9 and four years later we were in the playoffs for the first time in school history. When we lost a playoff game to finally end our season, I remember one of our moms saying it was "too bad that our season had to end on a loss." I had to explain to her that we were now a PLAYOFF PROGRAM and thats how it would always be until we won the State Championship. We no longer had the option to schedule a weak sister as our "last game" as we were no longer a struggling (losing) program. Look for ways to measure success that don't involve winning on the scoreboard. Eventaully you will be able to count the wins on the field as well as the wins within the program.
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Post by CoachMikeJudy on Nov 8, 2009 17:31:25 GMT -6
I think Phantom's advice is well said- don't make any rash decisions immediately after the season.
I personally feel like we, as a team, need a minimum of 7 days w/out "talking shop" after the season...good or bad.
One thing that is important after a bad run like you've had- YOU have to take the lead and devise the plan that will dig your program out of the hole- too often I've been an assistant that, when things are good, the HC has all the answers, but when things are bad he wants advice...it should be the other way around.
Be the alpha-male, take charge, and even if you have doubts move forward at full speed after a short post-season hiatus from FB.
Good luck my man
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Post by touchdownmaker on Nov 8, 2009 17:39:32 GMT -6
I will comment on one thing that is important.
I think it is important to interview your players after the season and talk about the season, its successes and failure. Be absolutely sure to discuss with each player if they are or are not doing what you have asked them to do in order for the team to be successful.
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Post by kylem56 on Nov 8, 2009 17:51:18 GMT -6
hlb2
This past season I was pretty much told the same thing by the HC I work for. His point was "they will never want it, have as much passion for, or take it as serious as us". Us coaches take alot of pride in what we do and we are all competitors who hate to lose. Im a young coach whos only been coaching varsity ball for 5 years now and this topic is one of the most frusterating to me. You gotta remember you arent the one who misses blocks, misses tackles, or drops balls. If you did your best as a coach, you gotta learn to live with it.
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Post by coachd5085 on Nov 8, 2009 18:26:34 GMT -6
4 laws of success 1. be impeccable in your word 2. never take anything personal. it is about them and not you. 3. never make assumptions make an {censored} out of U and Uption 4. always do your best. Funny how nobody blames the kids, or if you blame the kids you are a terrible coach, yet everything is your fault. Very funny profession we're in. Yes indeed. Crazy profession. However, I disagree with you about your point regarding blaming the kids. A recent example-- Bear Bryant is often said to have NEVER publicly blamed anyone for any losses. It was ALWAYS his fault... (However, he was Bear Bryant....) This holds true to your comments. In TODAY'S GAME, with TODAY'S values and TODAY's media coverage... this seems to work against you. Case in Point, Saban seems to universally lay blame all around. In interviews it constantly comes off as he has done everything correctly, and his players and staff that are not getting it done. (Note--this may be 100% true.) He is generally considered as one of the premier college coaches in the country. His counterpart at LSU...Les Miles never seems to say ANYTHING negative. He has publicly praised his OL, calling it the most physical OL he has ever coached....even though it is painfully obvious that they are the worst performing OL he has had in his tenure at LSU. He deflects all blame away from that OL and his young QB...and for his altruistic efforts the Baton Rouge faithful constantly berate Coach Miles because LSU didn't beat Florida or Alabama. |
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Post by hlb2 on Nov 9, 2009 5:39:35 GMT -6
hlb2 If you did your best as a coach, you gotta learn to live with it. Any ideas on how to do this?  I'm telling you I'm spent. I did not get out of bed on Sat. until almost 2 P.M.!!! I'm usually up at 7 ready and raring to go. I just couldn't force myself to get up. I have never been in such a funk, and it concerns me. We went from being a team that everyone was concerned with because of how hard we played to being somebody's doormat in an instant, and I cannot figure it out. I guess that's why I don't have kids, they are too prone to letting you down. |
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Post by touchdownmaker on Nov 9, 2009 6:16:00 GMT -6
Hang in there coach, this is a big ego business and its tough on the ego when things dont go as you might have hoped and expected.
I learned that even the big winners in this field can become big losers in an instant. sometimes its team chemistry, staff chemistry or just a big grey cloud over the season. Look at the Tenn Titans, they were world beaters a year ago at this point.
I think of a guy I know that was a winner for at least 10 years in a row, he got a bit cocky, then had a dog of a season and hes not been heard from since. He has a habit of tucking his tail and running off when the talent is dry too so Id imagine he will find a different spot to coach next year if he decides to coach at all. With all of us, losing hurts- the kids compensate with singing, humor, quitting , looking forward to basketball etc, we compensate with...uh...getting back to work and trying to figure out where we went wrong. Ie- I dont know about you but I have questioned just about everything we did from talent evaluation, workouts, practices, use of staff, use of talent, discipline, emphasis on things other than talent etc. Whats important is that you stay the course within the boundaries of your winning formula, if it doesnt take, it doesnt take. You wont be the first or last coach to have a dog of a season.
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Post by hlb2 on Nov 9, 2009 6:23:25 GMT -6
I understand, I just would like to have a good season. I'm 1-19 as an HC, you begin to wonder how smart the man in the mirror is after 1 win in 2 seasons.
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Post by touchdownmaker on Nov 9, 2009 6:42:39 GMT -6
I hear ya, take a close look at the kids, were you losing to teams that you "should have" beaten?
chances are your not an "inferior coach" but probably have "inferior talent" thats going to take some time to develop. Nobody leaves when the cupboard is full so when you took over I imagine it wasnt a team full of all stars. Anyone can coach those guys.
We were 2-6 this year and trust me, thats disappointing as can be, we had the talent (before injuries) to win one or two more and it would have taken some serious coaching to win 5 this year (not to mention luck, avoiding injury and eligibility and quitting). We won 5 last year and the difference, in my opinion, was the 3 all stars on the team that could play some ball. We had 8 seniors last year, we played most of this year with 2. Still, like you, I question my ability.
take a look at some things like injuries...grades, discipline...attendance to wt room, those things factor into your success.
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Post by wingt74 on Nov 9, 2009 7:49:54 GMT -6
Yeah I get that. I just find that my hate for losing drives me more than the joy of winning. Meanwhile, it seems like the players don't seem bothered by losing and get overly inflated egos when they win... You sir, are not alone. |
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Post by coachcb on Nov 9, 2009 8:59:40 GMT -6
And one thing to remember; losing brings some bad things out of the wood work, no matter how you cut it. Fellow coaches, the kids, parents, and community are all upset; again nothing that you can control. Focus on what you can control and go from there; then the only time you'll take something personally is when you don't feel you've prepared the players as well as you could.
Then you can solve it; you go out, fix the issue the best you can, and then you can stop taking it personally.
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Post by casec11 on Nov 9, 2009 9:31:33 GMT -6
I understand, I just would like to have a good season. I'm 1-19 as an HC, you begin to wonder how smart the man in the mirror is after 1 win in 2 seasons. Your teams played better overall this season from last season... Can you improve next season? You are headed in the right direction. Identify somethings that will help your team to improve this offseason and get to work. [glow=red,2,300]As of right now, to start next season, you are 0-0. [/glow] |
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I'm telling you I'm spent. I did not get out of bed on Sat. until almost 2 P.M.!!! I'm usually up at 7 ready and raring to go. I just couldn't force myself to get up. I have never been in such a funk, and it concerns me. We went from being a team that everyone was concerned with because of how hard we played to being somebody's doormat in an instant, and I cannot figure it out. I guess that's why I don't have kids, they are too prone to letting you down.
