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Post by touchdownmaker on Feb 6, 2009 6:25:20 GMT -6
As a general rule for operating a program, I never wanted Dads on my staff. I had no luck finding other assistants at first and now I think I have a good staff but wow, it will look like Fathers day out there on friday night!!! Loyal, hard working, good values. Wanting what is best for the kids, the program and able to set aside selfish wants.
anyone else have an opinion or experience on this sort of thing? We are a very small school.
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Post by jpdaley25 on Feb 6, 2009 7:40:41 GMT -6
I have to do that too. My biggest worry is that there will be the perception/accusation that those kids are playing ahead of someone else because their fathers are on the staff. I'm already preparing a game plan for that contingency. My coaches' sons are all 8th and 9th graders as of now, so the doodoo hasn't hit the fan yet - but it will, and it will for you. Be ready for some insulting and emotional attacks on your character and that of your assistants. One argumentative line is that you set the starting lineup, not your assistants. The best argument, however, is to win. Good luck - to the both of us!
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Post by touchdownmaker on Feb 6, 2009 8:17:08 GMT -6
Exactly, we have already had the attacks and these are real quality people. We use a point system to help determine playing time (not starters so much as just pt) anyhow the whiners do not have a leg to stand on. Want to play more? then show up and earn the 40 points a month like everyone else.
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Post by jpdaley25 on Feb 6, 2009 9:50:12 GMT -6
Another thing you can do is to invite that person onto the staff. "Look, if you think little Johnny is being treated unfairly, then maybe you should join up and see for yourself how we do things. You are going to have to pay $250.00 and spend a couple of weekends taking the class, (hand them all of the books and manuals you can find) learn what's in these books, and spend 2 to 3,000 hours with us over the next year. Heck, you can even start now - I'm fixing to go clean the toilets, showers, and do the laundry and I could use some help - welcome aboard! Oh, by the way, you will be making what all the other guys are making, which is ZERO."
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Post by outlawjoseywales on Feb 6, 2009 11:22:45 GMT -6
TDmaker,
The "father's day" thing only becomes BAD because of the people. You know that football is about people anyway.
If you have good mentally and emotionally balanced dads, then you will be fine.
If you have just one crazy guy in there, it's going to be bad. One loud-mouthed, crazy Dad on the sidelines will make a mess out of anything going on.
In all my years we never had dad's anywhere, never had a Dad on staff, nor had a Dad as a head coach, never wanted a Dad, had nothing but trouble from meddling Dads', and I've got all girls-so no chance there.
EXCEPT for now.
I'm loading down with them, and next year I might have another.
In my current situation at a small private school where we started the program-Dad's are everywhere.
We are much better now than when we started.
When we started we had a couple of Dad's that seemed sane, looked sane, interviewed sane, practiced sane, but when they got to the games-you guessed it-INSANE.
Lucky for me, these two Dads moved on and are now driving another head coach crazy. Yeah me!
About as bad a situation as I've ever been around, these clowns centered all their attention, focus, and calls around their own son. They kept their sons in a wierd emotional frenzy and fear of messing up like nothing I've ever seen.
I had to fire one of them in the middle of a football game in the 2nd game of the season. Bad stuff.
The other two were worse and I'm not getting into it.
But the problem wasn't the idea of "DAd" on the sideline, it was these particular Dad's-and I would use that word loosely.
They were interested in themselves, not their sons. The sons were just an extention of their own dysfunction.
The only thing I can say is to hold your fire until you see if this is a problem. The problem is not Dads the problem is some Dads.
It's just like any other assistant coach situation, sometimes some guy will be fine at practice and be insane at a game.
We don't get rid of ALL assistants just because we get one bad apple do we?
Don't stick your head in the sand and think it will get better-it won't. If you have a problem with a Dad, deal with it quickly because it will just get worse.
Hope for the best, you might be lucky like I have for the last two years. Great staff, now good friends that have my back, and still Dads. I'm blessed like that right now.
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Post by coachcb on Feb 6, 2009 17:14:43 GMT -6
I would like to say that it depends on the father involved but, unfortunatetly, experience and past history has proven me wrong.
I have coached with exactly ONE dad who didn't cause problems with the program. He had coached at the D1 level for a lot of years, retired from coaching and came back because his son was in the program. He was a fantastic coach who did a great job of seperating "player" from "son".
On the flip side, every other father I have coached with has, in some magnitude, created a conflict of interest with respect to their son. Their reasoning for wanting to be involved isn't to be a "coach", its to be "their son's coach". Generally, they want to be "their son's coach" because they don't think the staff is doing a good enough job as is. You can see where my line of reasoning is going from here; it can get bad in a HURRY if you let it.
To be honest, I would have a hard time bringing fathers on a staff as a HC. If I did allow bring some on staff, I would be very specific about not creating a conflict of interest. I would make sure that they weren't assigned a position to coach their own son. I would also make it clear that they weren't there to coach their son and that doing so would result in them being removed from the staff.
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Post by touchdownmaker on Feb 7, 2009 5:01:36 GMT -6
I do not allow my Dads to coach their sons positions. I am also putting the Dads up in the booth rather than on the sidelines.
There was one dad who wanted to help last year but his negativity shone through from the moment I met him at the parent meeting. Needless to say he didnt make the cut.
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Post by phantom on Feb 7, 2009 10:30:38 GMT -6
I do not allow my Dads to coach their sons positions. I am also putting the Dads up in the booth rather than on the sidelines. Sounds good but let's look at a hypothetical- it's 10 years from now. Your OC/QB coach (that may be you, the HC) has a son who's clearly a D.1 talent at QB. What do you do? |
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Post by oguru on Feb 7, 2009 10:49:49 GMT -6
You play him because he is the best kid at that position. You make that clear to the AD and the other administrators and go win some games. If the other dads don't like it hand them your whistle and say go coach,and good luck.
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Post by coachcb on Feb 7, 2009 10:54:07 GMT -6
I do not allow my Dads to coach their sons positions. I am also putting the Dads up in the booth rather than on the sidelines. Sounds good but let's look at a hypothetical- it's 10 years from now. Your OC/QB coach (that may be you, the HC) has a son who's clearly a D.1 talent at QB. What do you do? That's a good point, but I am referring to situations where you have a father who wants to help with a program once his son is playing in it. As far as I'm concerned, if a coach has been with the program before his son enters it, he's grandfathered in. |
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Post by touchdownmaker on Feb 7, 2009 11:29:39 GMT -6
lol, seriously? If youre the header you do what you want and do not even sweat it. I coach Oline anyhow.
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Post by phantom on Feb 7, 2009 11:50:03 GMT -6
lol, seriously? If youre the header you do what you want and do not even sweat it. I coach Oline anyhow. OK so it's not the HC, it's the OC. |
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