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Post by ctv0006 on May 21, 2018 4:51:18 GMT -6
Have any of y’all ever had to live apart from your family during football season?
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Post by freezeoption on May 21, 2018 5:59:56 GMT -6
A long time ago I took a hfc job about 4 hours away. That summer I would leave Sunday night and get to my wife's grandma's house, which is where I stayed during the week. I would sleep on her couch. Then get up and drive 14 miles to the school I was at ready for weights at 6 am. Did this most of the summer, we didn't get our house sold till the next summer had to live in a crappy little town not far from the one I taught at and rented a double wide trailer. We had just adopted two boys the year before. I would leave Friday night to go back down to the house. When I got back home, packed, painted, tried to get the place ready for sale. Owning a house makes things complicated when coaching. We have lived in this house for 16 years, but I could have gone to some bigger and better paying schools if I was renting. I have friends who have called me up with job offers, but I have not moved because of the work to just sell a house.
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Post by CoachMikeJudy on May 21, 2018 6:14:39 GMT -6
Yes- for 5 months. I wasn't to her married yet.
Lived in VA for 3 years. Had built the program (as an assistant) to the point where we were going to make a run at the playoffs. My girlfriend (wife now) wanted to move back to Delaware, so we bought a house in June. Closed on it, and I moved her into it in the beginning of July. I stayed in VA, living in my HC's basement until January to see us through the season. Then I resigned and moved to DE where I've been ever since.
It wasn't easy, but solidified that my wife is one of the rare species of "supportive coaches wives" who is trying to win a game despite sacrifices on her end...she's more competitive than me!
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Post by craines10 on May 21, 2018 6:27:27 GMT -6
Couldn't do it! (physically)
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Post by hsrose on May 21, 2018 7:16:54 GMT -6
Lived apart for 4 years, about 150 miles apart. Son graduated HS but needed his 5th year at a JC before getting started. Daughter was coming into HS so it was a good break point. Wife needed to be with her mother who was 88+ and had a big house and property. So she and daughter went to live at her moms home where we are living now, son and I stayed in the city. I coached, son did JC, she helped her mom, daughter went to smaller school. It was hard but I traded that bitch wife for a sweet girlfriend, she got rid of that lazy husband and got a new boyfriend. Found that when we were together all the daily crap we do went away. Weren't worried about the garbage or washing the car or anything. Focused on time together with family and it was better. Downside is that I was coaching football so I only got to watch my daughter play HS volleyball once a year when we had our bye. I don't think we could/would have done this if the kids were younger, but it was the perfect time to make the move like that.
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lmorris
Sophomore Member
Posts: 195
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Post by lmorris on May 21, 2018 7:18:06 GMT -6
lmao had to sell my house last year, and wasn't looking like it was going to work out in time for the move, wife informed me we could live in the field house together with our three kids before I moved somewhere without her. Put a serious strain on the budget as we found a little house to rent while ours sold. Think we spent every bit of what we made on the house during the renting process.
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Post by ctv0006 on May 21, 2018 8:58:33 GMT -6
Thanks for the input fellas
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bdm
Sophomore Member
Posts: 104 
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Post by bdm on May 21, 2018 12:09:21 GMT -6
I second the whole selling a house thing, its a MF'er. I took a head coaching job last summer (my first HC job) we put our house up for sale it sat on the market for over 6 months. It finally sold in December. My wife had to find a job where we are now and that didn't happen until October so we were apart on and off for a few months last year but we are still living with my family until the house we bought is finished which wont be until december this year. Two families in the same house SUCKS.
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Post by joelee on May 21, 2018 13:09:11 GMT -6
I taught and coached at my current school for 2 years living in an apartment during the week. Drove here on Sunday afternoon for staff meetings and most weeks didn't go back home till Friday after the game. When my wife finally got a job here we put our house on the market for less than a month before it sold thank GOD.
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Post by IronmanFootball on May 21, 2018 13:09:31 GMT -6
People ask why we always rent, this is the reason why. I don't want to be trapped into some place for 20 years.
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Post by fshamrock on May 21, 2018 13:45:06 GMT -6
talked to a dude who had coached in FCS for 20 years...he said about 12 years ago when his kids got to middle school his wife told him that he could do whatever he wants but they were staying put...so he's had like 6 jobs all over the country while his wife raises his family every fall and during recruiting season...didn't ask for details but it seemed rough
lot to sacrifice
I've sold two houses while coaching and both sold relatively quickly so that was nice, but it is a huge hassle, If I weren't married I would rent forever, problem is you get way more home for your money when you buy....1500 rent around here gets you a pretty basic spread, paying 1500 in mortgage and you get a pretty nice pad
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Post by jgordon1 on May 21, 2018 13:57:34 GMT -6
I did it for a year for a "once in a lifetime opportunity" It sucked. I had a cool apartment and everything but it was horrible...
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Post by blb on May 21, 2018 15:10:07 GMT -6
Never did it during Football season, only for a few months beginning in January '84 when I took a full-time job because I hadn't had one. My wife was finishing her degree and couldn't move until end of semester (April).
So we were apart for awhile. Several times I missed her (and our new-born daughter, they were living with my Mother-in-law) during the week so much I drove there after school, spent the night, got up at 5 AM, and drove hour and a half back to school to teach. Not to mention weekends.
I loved coaching football, but I love my wife and family more.
Bottom line - if I hadn't taken this job to help our family in the long run because I didn't have a full-time teaching-coaching gig before, never would have done it.
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Post by utchuckd on May 21, 2018 16:01:56 GMT -6
Timing is everything. Sold a house here a few years ago that sat on the market over a year. Today you can just about name your price for any house in decent condition around here.
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Post by Defcord on May 21, 2018 19:09:06 GMT -6
I have had to sell two houses because I like to move. Our first one we bought we were only in two years and it didn’t sell right away so we rented it out for 5 years. Finally got tired of that so we sold it. We had a good property management company and it was in a solid rental market so we were pretty much break even monthly for long enough that we broke even on the sell. The second one was an older home and to get it ready to sell we had to do some major upgrades. That put a dent in the savings so now my wife has said it’s rentals or roots.
Rentals really are pretty sweet. I am not handy at all so it’s nice when something goes wrong to not have to pay someone to fix it.
As far as living away from my wife it’s not something I think we would ever do. I can imagine a number of crazy situations that would take me on a new journey but none of them where she wouldn’t support me and jump on the ride. She loves her latest job so and I love mine too so we are probably hanging around but whenever I have presented her with new options she always just says “we can make this work.”
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Post by groundchuck on May 21, 2018 19:53:57 GMT -6
Without kids I could see it being done. With kids? My wife would kill me or divorce me or both.
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Post by wingtol on May 21, 2018 20:06:59 GMT -6
Without kids I could see it being done. With kids? My wife would kill me or divorce me or both. First she’s gonna kill you then she’s gonna divorce you. |
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Post by rsmith627 on May 22, 2018 4:02:37 GMT -6
Sounds pretty appealing to me right now. No so much the wife, but the kids. The little creatures are driving me nuts lately.
In all seriousness though, I don't know how well this would work. Especially if you have little kids. I want to be there and witness the milestones. If it's just you and the wife I'm sure it can work.
When we moved back to Michigan my wife and first daughter flew back early and stayed with family, while I wrapped things up in Utah. It was only a week but it was tough on both of us. I can't imagine doing it for longer.
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