|
Post by JVD on Oct 24, 2017 9:19:21 GMT -6
Trying to document things we want to address next year in our parent letter. Coaching Freshman, we have to teach them how to football, how to team-mate, and how to not be a pop-warner player.... Things we want to address early that we didn't this year.
1) Appointments. Don't do them during practice. We play on Thursday, so Friday is a great day for appointments. Or, plan ahead and don't do them during the 9 week season.
2) Practice. Your athlete MUST make practice. This isn't pop-Warner where everyone plays every game, gets a ribbon and a pat on the back.
3) Be a man. If your athlete is going to miss practice. They must "Man-up" and tell the coach (Beforehand if possible). This year we had a player miss 3 days and then showed up like nothing was wrong....
What do you address with parents that they may not know about HS football?
JVD
|
|
|
Post by carookie on Oct 24, 2017 10:15:57 GMT -6
I think it reads a bit condescending and may be burning a few bridges before hand. Why the need for the snarkiness about pop warner or the example of the player missing 3 practices? Just state your rules and consequences without being insulting.
In addition to some of the things you mentioned I would also address not discussing playing time with parents or injuries to other players. Establishing an injury protocol and what going to the doctor means for players being allowed to play. Communication norms, summer and fall schedules, school grade policies, and any assistance you may need (snack bar, chain gangs, etc)
|
|
|
Post by coachnswords on Oct 24, 2017 10:35:12 GMT -6
Read the Matheny Manifesto by Mike Matheny. He outlines what a solid parent/coach contract should look like.
|
|
|
Post by JVD on Oct 24, 2017 11:30:23 GMT -6
I think it reads a bit condescending and may be burning a few bridges before hand. Why the need for the snarkiness about pop warner or the example of the player missing 3 practices? Just state your rules and consequences without being insulting. In addition to some of the things you mentioned I would also address not discussing playing time with parents or injuries to other players. Establishing an injury protocol and what going to the doctor means for players being allowed to play. Communication norms, summer and fall schedules, school grade policies, and any assistance you may need (snack bar, chain gangs, etc) We wouldn't be "snarky" about pop-warner in the letter/meeting. (It is our #1 issue when they get to HS though....we have zero control over it, what they are taught, etc....we are working on that.) I wouldn't give the examples to the parents...just to the guys on this board. We do talk about injuries and playing time. We also talk about schedules and grades. Looking for more examples/ideas for making our communication better.
|
|
|
Post by seabass on Oct 24, 2017 14:29:12 GMT -6
A face to face meeting is the best way to cover these things...IMO. Sending an accompanying document home with parents is a good idea too but I wouldn't rely on a piece of pare to convey your conviction to the policies. Maybe you already do that.
Expectations for practice attendance is at the top of my list of things to cover in a parent meeting. The more clear and defined you are the more likely it is that everybody meets your expectation. If they know you are dead serious and unwavering to your policy, most will do what they can to adhere to it.
I coached a Pop Warner team for 5 years. We had team rules in regards to practice attendance and playing time. We were required to get every kid 10 snaps if they were in inform...BUT we didn't have to allow them to suit up. I suspended the same player twice in one season for unexcused miised practices. The first time he sat for a half, we got him his 10 plays and sat him the remainder of the game. The second time (same season) I didn't allow him to suit up for the game, he was suspended for that entire game.
We defined "excused" and "unexcused" practices. I felt like there were some legitimate reasons for missing a practice, you might not feel the same, that's up to you. Any practice that was missed without prior notification was considered unexcused regardless of the reason. Even if excused, a starter would not start a game in which he missed a practice.
Never assume anything is implied! I laid out the same set of rules every year and practice participation was never an issue. One year I had mostly returners and brushed over practice expectations. It only took 2 weeks for it to become an issue. that was my fault...lesson learned.
|
|
|
Post by fkaboneyard on Oct 24, 2017 15:09:09 GMT -6
"Your son is joining something bigger than himself to achieve something great. He will be held accountable by coaches and other players, just as he will hold other players and coaches accountable. You can help your son by assuring that he is at every practice unless there is a family emergency or a significant illness. At times your son will feel overwhelmed but it is part of the process to becoming a good football player...."
|
|
|
Post by bartimus58 on Oct 24, 2017 19:28:36 GMT -6
I would include information on your workout program and expectations to be there too.
|
|
|
Post by cwaltsmith on Oct 25, 2017 7:21:20 GMT -6
I am going to try to shift this topic from what parents and players can't do to what we expect and hope they do. Gonna give each parent a questionnaire of 4 questions and keep them. Questions will be...
1.)list a measurable goal for your son and this team for this year... 2.)What do you want your experience as a parent to be this year.... 3.)What can you do to help create this experience for you and others?? what can coaches do?? 4.)If goals can't be reached, what do you want your son's experience to be like?
Not sure I like #4 100% bc of the negative context it suggests about not being successful, but I think trying to get parents to start off positively and lay out what you would like from them is a better way to go.
I learned from experience...
IF YOU LOSE THE PARENTS IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THEY CONVINCE THE KIDS aND YOU LOSE THEM TOO!!!
|
|
|
Post by mrjvi on Oct 25, 2017 7:46:43 GMT -6
IF YOU LOSE THE PARENTS IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THEY CONVINCE THE KIDS aND YOU LOSE THEM TOO!!!
This is often true but there was an extremely successful coach who pretty much mentored me that was the opposite. He would say if I win over the kids, then I've won the parents. The kids will beg their parents to not interfere in the coaching. Not always true, I know, but I saw it first hand.
|
|
|
Post by cwaltsmith on Oct 25, 2017 7:50:00 GMT -6
IF YOU LOSE THE PARENTS IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THEY CONVINCE THE KIDS aND YOU LOSE THEM TOO!!! This is often true but there was an extremely successful coach who pretty much mentored me that was the opposite. He would say if I win over the kids, then I've won the parents. The kids will beg their parents to not interfere in the coaching. Not always true, I know, but I saw it first hand. I agree it can happen that way... and several years ago this was even more true... but this generation on kids and helicopter parents is a little different IMHO... agree it can be done without parent support, but I think trying to get them on your side is better no days especially.
|
|
|
Post by fkaboneyard on Oct 25, 2017 9:44:31 GMT -6
Some years back I coached for a guy that would have a little social event at the beginning of the season for all players & parents that were new to his program. This wasn't the "parent meeting" where the coach & team mom gave all the expectations/requirements for the year, it was a deal we affectionately referred to as "FNG night". It was held at his or another coach's house, we would feed them, and each parent would stand up with their son and talk about them for a few minutes. They didn't have a script, just tell us about your kid. Initially I hated FNG night but later really saw the value in it because you could learn a lot about a kid and a lot about the parent, just by listening to them talk about their kid. It also really helped build community among the parents. So when a kid that was an important part of the team was missing practices or a game, the other parents would actually pressure the kid's parents to get his act together.
I realize it would be difficult to pull that off in a school with a ton of new kids and there is a risk they could combine their forces for evil but it really worked in that program. By the time they were seniors there was a ton of community and veteran parents would keep new parents in line. Your mileage may vary.
|
|
|
Post by aceback76 on Oct 25, 2017 10:35:18 GMT -6
Trying to document things we want to address next year in our parent letter. Coaching Freshman, we have to teach them how to football, how to team-mate, and how to not be a pop-warner player.... Things we want to address early that we didn't this year. 1) Appointments. Don't do them during practice. We play on Thursday, so Friday is a great day for appointments. Or, plan ahead and don't do them during the 9 week season. 2) Practice. Your athlete MUST make practice. This isn't pop-Warner where everyone plays every game, gets a ribbon and a pat on the back. 3) Be a man. If your athlete is going to miss practice. They must "Man-up" and tell the coach (Beforehand if possible). This year we had a player miss 3 days and then showed up like nothing was wrong.... What do you address with parents that they may not know about HS football? JVD In addition to things you mentioned, here are some that come to mind: 1. Being positive with your son. 2. Encourage him to follow Training Rules. 3. Supporting the Coaching Staff in their decisions. 4. Insisting on positive behavior at school (& classroom). 5. Stay calm in injury situations (& why Football is safer than hunting, swimming, & cars). 6. Promote having fun and being a team player (understanding very few high school athletes receive college scholarships). 7. Help him to keep jobs & cars in proper perspective 8. Understand that he must attend all practices & contests ("if the TEAM is required to be there, every member MUST"). 9. See that he gets well-balanced meals & proper sleep. 10. Understand that "specialization in one sport" can be too limiting, when he may have abilities in others. 11. Persistence and being able to accept a role is extremely important for the team to be successful (not everyone will be a starter, but everyone is important to the team. Some players may not develop until their Senior year. Encourage them to be persistent).
|
|
|
Post by chi5hi on Oct 25, 2017 11:35:47 GMT -6
I am going to try to shift this topic from what parents and players can't do to what we expect and hope they do. Gonna give each parent a questionnaire of 4 questions and keep them. Questions will be... 1.)list a measurable goal for your son and this team for this year... 2.)What do you want your experience as a parent to be this year.... 3.)What can you do to help create this experience for you and others?? what can coaches do?? 4.)If goals can't be reached, what do you want your son's experience to be like? Not sure I like #4 100% bc of the negative context it suggests about not being successful, but I think trying to get parents to start off positively and lay out what you would like from them is a better way to go. I learned from experience... IF YOU LOSE THE PARENTS IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THEY CONVINCE THE KIDS aND YOU LOSE THEM TOO!!! Tried something like this many years ago. I'll never do it again. It was without value. Since that time I've come to realize that these guys are just trying to have some fun after school. That's all! I think that too often, coaches try to place the importance of THEIR OWN personal dedication to the sport into a bunch of kids that just want to run around and roll in the mud whenever they can. IMO...and what I do...is a simple letter giving information. Schedules, times, what physical training we'll do. Stuff like that.
|
|
|
Post by cwaltsmith on Oct 25, 2017 11:40:48 GMT -6
We also had a coach in our state tell at a clinic a few years ago that he visited the home of every player to introduce himself and meet the parents or gaudians
|
|
|
Post by chi5hi on Oct 25, 2017 11:45:11 GMT -6
We also had a coach in our state tell at a clinic a few years ago that he visited the home of every player to introduce himself and meet the parents or gaudians I'd never do that. I can't see a reason for it. My time after work belongs to me and the family, not his.
|
|
|
Post by carookie on Oct 25, 2017 11:47:12 GMT -6
We also had a coach in our state tell at a clinic a few years ago that he visited the home of every player to introduce himself and meet the parents or gaudians How big was his team?
|
|
|
Post by cwaltsmith on Oct 25, 2017 12:51:26 GMT -6
It was a 6 A (BIG) school. He retired last year I think after over 30 years of coaching... Very respected in our state. He said it wasn't a long meeting. Said it was just a drop in say hello intro kinda deal. He was big proponent of it, said it helped build that relationship... showed he cared.
|
|
|
Post by 50slantstrong on Oct 28, 2017 18:56:04 GMT -6
Maybe mention something about how to air your grievances. Suggest waiting 24 hours until posting something on the internet about the game. We’ve had a few parents this year make total asses out of themselves posting on message boards and or social media right after a game. All it does is it makes them look bad in the long run. Maybe mention something about how the internet is permanent.
|
|
|
Post by Yash on Oct 28, 2017 20:13:41 GMT -6
I am going to try to shift this topic from what parents and players can't do to what we expect and hope they do. Gonna give each parent a questionnaire of 4 questions and keep them. Questions will be... 1.)list a measurable goal for your son and this team for this year... 2.)What do you want your experience as a parent to be this year.... 3.)What can you do to help create this experience for you and others?? what can coaches do?? 4.)If goals can't be reached, what do you want your son's experience to be like? Not sure I like #4 100% bc of the negative context it suggests about not being successful, but I think trying to get parents to start off positively and lay out what you would like from them is a better way to go. I learned from experience... IF YOU LOSE THE PARENTS IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THEY CONVINCE THE KIDS aND YOU LOSE THEM TOO!!! Did you get this from that girls basketball coach that did something similar to this? Forgot his name but remember reading about it online.
|
|
|
Post by mrjvi on Oct 29, 2017 7:37:06 GMT -6
Regardless of what you do there will be parents loving and hating you. I just give them insight into what our program objectives, rules and consequences will be as well as OUR goals. I will hopefully give their sons a positive experience that will help them adjust better to the world. Unless they are my friends, I really don't care what they think of my program. If enough hate the positive direction I always strive to go, then I don't need to be there anymore. This year at my new school, we had what I consider a great directional change season for a program that has been struggling. Administration is very happy with it. Except for the parent meeting, I've only talked with 2 parents all season. I couldn't recognize any others. Fine by me.
|
|