Post by tippecanoe41 on Sept 14, 2017 21:35:52 GMT -6
Our head coach and assistant head coach recently had a problem with a kid. Long story short, the kid's ankle was tweaked and, while he is cleared to go (just soreness), because of it, he's not quite able to do what he needs to do. As such, when we called for starting D-line, the D-line coach did not put him in there, even though he has been a starter all season. I was not there, but was told by the head coach that he noticed the kid was having a bad attitude so he talked to him after practice just to see what was going on, along with the assistant head coach. They said he was crying actual tears. They explained that it was not because they didn't think that he was a good player or that he wasn't working hard, but just because he was dinged up they weren't sure whether or not he'd be ready to go full speed on Friday so they needed to be ready for in case he wasn't. Still, he could not be consoled and be made to believe that we weren't benching him for the rest of his life because of whatever, and that we weren't punishing him arbitrarily just to be jerks. We've all had those kids who just always say that coaches aren't noticing them, even though we are, because they think they should be starting instead of so and so, but you would have thought that the explanation about the status of his ankle and an assurance that if he's able to play, he will, would be enough to squash any bad feelings.
Where does this come from? I mean, this is a kid who has had a good attitude and has been working hard, but now because he is injured and might have to play less because of an injury, it's like we have betrayed him and are just terrible people who woke up this day and decided to strip him of a future, regardless of the hard work that he has put in to this point. How do you coach players like this? We talk constantly about being team players and doing what's best for the team as a whole, etc.
I guess I'm just wondering how you get a guy out of the victim mentality? I understand that some of our guys have home lives that just suck! So how do you prove to a kid that you care about him? I once joked with a kid that I only coach for the money. He actually believed it!!!, and I had to explain to him that I make about 60 cents an hour, or whatever it is, haha.
Seems like the last few years we have kids who are all at once acting like they are a dog who has been beat too much, but also they have parents who tell them 20 times a day that they are the greatest thing ever and better than everybody. I don't know what creates kids like this. It's truly a weird mentality to try to work with. Don't know if anyone ever sees it. But it's like you try to correct something, and they want to start with excuses about stuff, etc. You have to tell them, in a normal voice, "Hey, I'm not mad or yelling, I'm just trying to help you out to do it better next time," and they still act like you just crawled in their helmet. But then if you try to tell them "great job" when they do something, they want to crawl in their own helmets and put themselves down because it wasn't absolutely perfect, and you have to stop them from beating themselves up.
Anyway, I'm just having a tough time figuring kids out the last couple years. I want to do a good job with them, but these days it seems more about being a good psychologist than about teaching fundamentals, etc. Just looking for opinions, or anybody that wants to vent, or whatever, haha.
Where does this come from? I mean, this is a kid who has had a good attitude and has been working hard, but now because he is injured and might have to play less because of an injury, it's like we have betrayed him and are just terrible people who woke up this day and decided to strip him of a future, regardless of the hard work that he has put in to this point. How do you coach players like this? We talk constantly about being team players and doing what's best for the team as a whole, etc.
I guess I'm just wondering how you get a guy out of the victim mentality? I understand that some of our guys have home lives that just suck! So how do you prove to a kid that you care about him? I once joked with a kid that I only coach for the money. He actually believed it!!!, and I had to explain to him that I make about 60 cents an hour, or whatever it is, haha.
Seems like the last few years we have kids who are all at once acting like they are a dog who has been beat too much, but also they have parents who tell them 20 times a day that they are the greatest thing ever and better than everybody. I don't know what creates kids like this. It's truly a weird mentality to try to work with. Don't know if anyone ever sees it. But it's like you try to correct something, and they want to start with excuses about stuff, etc. You have to tell them, in a normal voice, "Hey, I'm not mad or yelling, I'm just trying to help you out to do it better next time," and they still act like you just crawled in their helmet. But then if you try to tell them "great job" when they do something, they want to crawl in their own helmets and put themselves down because it wasn't absolutely perfect, and you have to stop them from beating themselves up.
Anyway, I'm just having a tough time figuring kids out the last couple years. I want to do a good job with them, but these days it seems more about being a good psychologist than about teaching fundamentals, etc. Just looking for opinions, or anybody that wants to vent, or whatever, haha.
