Facemelter? What are you guys talking about?

It's a joke based on the idea that there's a single offense or defense that's better than any other.

Bro, do you even facemelter?

I would explain it but I have a clinic to get to.

Ahhh, in that thread I clearly say patenet pending ya'll owe me a dollar for trade mark infringement. As the Designer and authoritarian of the facemelter I can teach sell you that offense or you can wait for my 2016 Faster then Fast RPO Offense called Dark lightning.

DARK LIGHTING ®  Trademarked!!!

Are they compatible?
I always thought the facemelter needed to be faster. It was getting a little old school, my parents (dads) were concerned that we weren't modern enough.

Simply put, it will revolutionize the game. Dark Lightning is so deceptive that YOU don't even know what play is being called. The players choose a random number on their wristband that gives them a direction to go at the snap. No two plays that you run next year will be the same! no tendencies! It's based on Chaos theory, String theory, Game theory,Pythagoras and quantum mechanics.

You are also forgetting the straight line defense. Or as we called it the "whip of death"

And for just a small fee of $25,000 dollars and your first born male child they can come to you and run a camp to install it.

I've read an article about Dark Lightning that said it is a hybrid offense of HUNH Spread, with a dab of Single Wing, sprinkled in with a touch of Notre Dame Box, with a smattering of short yardage Maryland Power I. Rumor has it that Ty Detmer has tweaked it to possess some West Coast philosophy in it.

One team in Montana has supposedly ran it only to have their team disbanded by the MHSAA for "beating every oppenent into a drunken stupor", according to MHSAA Director McGuyver McWilliamsonieton.

If you are wondering what article I read, don't bother.  It has since been zapped from the internet by the FCC due to a bully lawsuit that is being put together by all opponents who played teams who ran the Dark Lightning offense.

I had cutups of a game in which one team played the facemelter defense, the other team the dark lightning offense. State Championship game obviously.

My hard drive got outhit, couldn't handle the heat and broke down.
It's a shame, wanted to share it here otherwise.

I can testify the brilliance of the Dark Lightning offense here guys. If you aren't running it you need to. The beauty in this offense is in its complexity. I know many of us subscribe to the keep it simple, stupid thinking process. myself included.

Now, I'll admit I was a bit skeptical about paying the $899 fee to get into this system, and I was more skeptical when they told us the playbook had 753 plays in it. I was concerned our kids couldn't remember that many plays and wouldn't be able to execute them, but they haven't needed to. We haven't played a down of football since installing this offense, as opposing teams just forfeit to us because they don't want to embarrass themselves and their teams.

Yes order rings, but more importantly start building trophy cases.

Is trouble shooting the facemelter new material? I thought there were no problems with it ever. It just melts faces.