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Post by Coach Bennett on Jan 12, 2014 11:22:14 GMT -6
Perhaps this is not the place for this, and if so I apologize, but when did becoming a dad require you to be around your child every waking moment you can? I have a coaching friend who HAS to be home to give his kid a bath and do the whole bed time stuff. Why? I have two kids and I love them to death and I'm pretty sure they reciprocate, but I'm not there for everything they ever do. They realize that there is some stuff I'm not going to be there for and they're good with that. I do less of the "grind" type stuff than most HCs, but it still adds up. I don't know when or why fatherhood has changed to this notion that you're not a good dad if you're not there ALL the time. Live your life. Make some small concessions, but don't radically change everything. Your family's reality will be whatever you set it as. Great post. How often do we see kids/athletes whose parents haven't quite cut the umbilical cord? Negligence regarding your kid is unacceptable but your kid realizing and coping with the fact that there are times when you're not going to be there is, in my opinion, important.
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Post by coach2013 on Jan 12, 2014 11:25:02 GMT -6
One of the best days ever- when My son loads up " All - Steelers" team on Madden and beats me. He is 7. Life after football season with kids is awesome.
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noco
Freshmen Member
Posts: 23
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Post by noco on Jan 12, 2014 14:07:07 GMT -6
Larrymoe, you raise a point I think is important but often lost by young coaches. I'm a bit old school perhaps, but I believe part of raising kids is making them understand that they are not the center of the universe. Sacrifice and compromise is part of life and the sooner they learn that the better. My kids are older and out and they seem to value the fact that their father coaches, and now they do too. Rather than feel deprived, I think they've learned to appreciate the fact that sometimes what you do for others is more important than what is done for you. Doing only those things "that are best for my family/kids" is a form of selfishness in my opinion. Men gave generously of their time to me when I was playing and it made a difference. I've tried to give some back and so will my children.
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Post by Coach Bennett on Jan 13, 2014 8:50:32 GMT -6
Doing only those things "that are best for my family/kids" is a form of selfishness in my opinion. Men gave generously of their time to me when I was playing and it made a difference. I've tried to give some back and so will my children. I was thinking this exact same thing. In recent years had a coach who decided not to stick it out b/c he felt too much time was being taken away from his kids. I, perhaps not so smoothly, reminded him that when he was in school all of his coaches had kids too.
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Post by larrymoe on Jan 13, 2014 8:54:56 GMT -6
Doing only those things "that are best for my family/kids" is a form of selfishness in my opinion. Men gave generously of their time to me when I was playing and it made a difference. I've tried to give some back and so will my children. I was thinking this exact same thing. In recent years had a coach who decided not to stick it out b/c he felt too much time was being taken away from his kids. I, perhaps not so smoothly, reminded him that when he was in school all of his coaches had kids too. This can't possibly be. It takes a village to raise a child.
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Post by blb on Jan 13, 2014 10:48:33 GMT -6
A point to ponder... and every village has an idiot...perhaps the idiot is that child...
No, the "idiot" is usually the HS football coach.
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Post by bluedevils10 on Feb 15, 2014 18:30:47 GMT -6
Hey guys, I am in the same situation...my wife is pregnant with our first child due in March and I am working on taking over a program in my first year as a HC. I'm extremely excited to become a dad and reading through these posts has given me a lot of ideas and suggestions on how to handle the changes. Appreciate all the comments and people sharing!
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Post by rsmith627 on Feb 15, 2014 19:55:10 GMT -6
Solid advice guys. Just found out we're expecting too. Baby will be born in late October/early November if everything works out right. Fortunately I'm at a place where I don't vision making a deep playoff run (this is the only year where I find that fortunate).
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lynx22
Freshmen Member
Posts: 20
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Post by lynx22 on Feb 16, 2014 18:34:19 GMT -6
2, 5, 8, 11. Feed the baby on the schedule. After 2 months you can cut out the 11 pm feeding. Just survive the first 2 months and you got it made.
Also, do the 2 am feeding. She needs the sleep, plus it's amazing what you figure out about football, school, and life then.
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Post by Coach Sunzeri DB's on Feb 19, 2014 1:02:07 GMT -6
Had a baby last July, went through entire season with a newborn and a 2 year old at home. I was student teaching as well. A blur. A sleep deprived, overworked, un-paid, whirlwind of a 7-2 season. Advice to Dads: work your ass off to feed those children, don't mess around with booze, drugs, or video games. Be a man and do what it takes to be a good role model for your players, a good Dad for your children and a Great husband to your wife (flowers, flowers, and more flowers EVERY Sunday). Can't bring your kid to practice? Oh well, Mom has to make sacrifices too. When she's up nursing at 3AM, sit with her and rub her back. When you need to stay late, text her or call immediately, and never lie.
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Post by WTR on Feb 21, 2014 22:19:08 GMT -6
Always remember, being a Dad is the most important job you will ever have.
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