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Post by joker31 on Sept 5, 2013 0:17:15 GMT -6
Hey guys, I've come to realize my biggest flaw has nothing to do with Xs and Os but about connecting with players. I'm what many or most would consider strictly a football coach. Which I don't want.
I invest quite a bit of time year-round and do care about the kids but don't show it well. I think they know I care since I'm around all the time, but I feel they'll never truly play for me or to their full potential unless I show I care about them outside of the setting, which I don't show that I do.
The thing is I can't go around and do a full 180 and change because they'll think it's strange, so I want to slowly but surely bring it along. So what are things you do here and there to show you care? |
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Post by coache67 on Sept 5, 2013 7:01:43 GMT -6
Just chat them up. Cars, video games, lunch...anything not about football. When you walk through the locker room before or after practice, crack a joke. Let them know that you are a human being as well as their coach. That was one of the biggest aspects to our turning around a program that was one of the worst in the state.
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Post by pvogel on Sept 5, 2013 10:46:20 GMT -6
Are you new to the area? Never lived there?
Make sure you know the area. Drive through your neighborhoods. Drive kids home (if allowed).
Like the other fellas said, just talk with em. Listen to their music occasionally. Doesnt have to be on your ipod, but occasionally flip to their favorite radio stations. Understand whats popular with them. You dont have to like what they like and you can talk trash about the garbage they watch/listen to (I do all the time) but at least youre talking about something they understand and sre interested.
So no, regardless of how funny you think they are, your M*A*S*H* references won't go far... haha
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Post by coachphillip on Sept 5, 2013 11:29:32 GMT -6
Are you new to the area? Never lived there? Make sure you know the area. Drive through your neighborhoods. Drive kids home (if allowed). Like the other fellas said, just talk with em. Listen to their music occasionally. Doesnt have to be on your ipod, but occasionally flip to their favorite radio stations. Understand whats popular with them. You dont have to like what they like and you can talk trash about the garbage they watch/listen to (I do all the time) but at least youre talking about something they understand and sre interested. So no, regardless of how funny you think they are, your M*A*S*H* references won't go far... haha Always fun teasing them by using their slang. We had one practice where our CB coach kept screaming things were "out of pocket" or "ratchet". Kids loved it. |
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Post by pvogel on Sept 5, 2013 11:39:07 GMT -6
Oh ya. Using stupid slang or repeating terrible grammar in "old man talk" is a personal favorite activity of mine.
But im also young enough that I use a decent amount. And having moved from an Inner-City Fresno school to a country WV school I find myself having to explain some terms I use... I have a very distinct dialect
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Post by coachphillip on Sept 5, 2013 11:58:48 GMT -6
Oh ya. Using stupid slang or repeating terrible grammar in "old man talk" is a personal favorite activity of mine. But im also young enough that I use a decent amount. And having moved from an Inner-City Fresno school to a country WV school I find myself having to explain some terms I use... I have a very distinct dialect I'm lucky I still coach where I grew up in the bay. Don't even know how I'd try to explain myself the first time I said "hella" during a practice. |
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Post by rsmith627 on Sept 5, 2013 12:45:45 GMT -6
To the OP, great advice is given here. Don't be a robot. Crack a joke here and there, and definitely talk to them. You can talk about sports not related to your team, girls, cars as already mentioned, etc. The big thing is to have a human side with these high school kids. Talk to them, don't just talk. Listen to them. Find out what's going on in their life outside of football.
Do these things and you'll have a great relationship. My players know they can come to me with anything and stop by my room throughout the day just to say hi and talk for a minute between passing time. It is great.
As you alluded to, they'll do anything I ask them to do. Another guy coaches my group with me, and the kids can't stand him. He is all football business all of the time.
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Post by mattharris75 on Sept 5, 2013 13:17:36 GMT -6
Good stuff in this thread. Another thing that's a good idea is to attend other sporting events in the off-season. No doubt some (possibly many) of your kids play other sports, and them seeing you at basketball and baseball games cheering for them and supporting them is just one more way to reinforce that you care about them outside of football.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 5, 2013 14:00:10 GMT -6
Hey guys, I've come to realize my biggest flaw has nothing to do with Xs and Os but about connecting with players. I'm what many or most would consider strictly a football coach. Which I don't want.
I invest quite a bit of time year-round and do care about the kids but don't show it well. I think they know I care since I'm around all the time, but I feel they'll never truly play for me or to their full potential unless I show I care about them outside of the setting, which I don't show that I do.
The thing is I can't go around and do a full 180 and change because they'll think it's strange, so I want to slowly but surely bring it along. So what are things you do here and there to show you care? Just talk to them. have a 5 minute conversation with them away from football....Kids will do more for you in those conversation than you can ever do for them, e.o.d. Make them football players, be honest, and be yourself AND THEY WILL GO HEAD FIRST into a brick for you. May not show it, but they will. |
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Post by jlenwood on Sept 5, 2013 21:33:24 GMT -6
I connect in different ways with different kids, but one thing is always a constant. If I believe you are on that practice field and you are giving me your best effort, I respect those kids. The kid might not even be that good or for that matter a starter, but by God he is on the field trying when he could be off doing something else (ie: a lot of choices for kids these days) and I respect that. In turn I have found that they pick up on that and you get their respect also.
Also, like almost everyone else has said, make it personal. Just today we were going over pre game individual stuff. I have DB's, and I get along great with all of them. Well, we have had a pretty rough week, lots of outside drama. So I brought all of them together and said I had some things that needed to be said. They all got quiet and looked at me like I was getting ready to lay one of those standard cliche laden speeches on them, and in my most sincere voice, I asked who I should start in my fantasy league this week at QB (Russell Wilson is my choice by the way). This unloaded a avalanche of ball busting and laughter and just letting loose with a coach and having some fun. Got right back to work and finished up with a great indy period.
It aint life or death, so keep it loose when needed.
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Post by fballcoachg on Sept 6, 2013 5:40:34 GMT -6
Oh ya. Using stupid slang or repeating terrible grammar in "old man talk" is a personal favorite activity of mine. But im also young enough that I use a decent amount. And having moved from an Inner-City Fresno school to a country WV school I find myself having to explain some terms I use... I have a very distinct dialect I'm lucky I still coach where I grew up in the bay. Don't even know how I'd try to explain myself the first time I said "hella" during a practice. Funny you guys say that. I went to a de facto city school, have always taught and coached at them and am now at a school in the sticks. There are times the kids look at me crazy for saying things and I have to take a step back, funny thing is it's not always "kid slang" I'm using! I've had some ask me or flat out say "Coach, I have no clue what that means." Interesting how different each area can be. To the OP, nothing new, talk to them about school, home, whatever. Put the branch out there and they'll climb it. |
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Post by utchuckd on Sept 6, 2013 7:32:40 GMT -6
...our CB coach kept screaming things were "out of pocket" or "ratchet". Kids loved it. Do what? Damn, back to urban dictionary. |
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