Coaching Horror Stories- Youth Teams

Dave, I've been fortunate enough to coach in a league that stresses sportsmanship and doesn't tolerate a lot of poor behavior on the sidelines, so we haven't had a lot of outrageous incidents. In fact, most of the worst behavior over the years has come from the stands rather than the sidelines. I hope that my new league here in Tucson is as well run - from what I've heard so far, it is, so I don't anticipate seeing too much bad behavior here, either.

In any event, here are some of the more memorable lowlights I can remember from over the years:

• In a 2002 flag game (6 and 7 year olds, a coach called timeout with about 10 seconds left and a 2 TD lead just to score one more TD to run up the score. I talked to him after the game and said something like, "Hey, coach, I was planning to come over here and tell you how impressed I was with your team's organization and discipline, but after that little stunt there at the end, I totally lost all respect for you." He said, "Hey, that's football." I said, "Really, at what level?? These kids are only six!!" He just shrugged his shoulders and walked away.
  
  
• In 2001 or 2002, the Chief Commissioner of our league, who was a friend of mine, was coaching a team for a new association (about 3-4 years old - I'm not even sure if it was appropriate for him to be coaching, given his position, but that's another story). As Chief Commissioner, he made it a point to lecture all the coaches in the league every year in our preseason rules meeting about treating the officials with respect and displaying proper sportsmanship, etc. Anyway, in a big game with playoff implications, he starts arguing with the officials. It should be noted that he was related to a number of the officials. He really lost his cool and was very animated in pointing and yelling and generally carrying on. I don't even know what he was arguing about, but to the officials' credit, they didn't back down and stood by their call. The whole incident was just embarrassing to watch.
  
  
• In 1998 a new inner-city program joined our league. The first time they visited our field, in the first game (Mitey Mite division - 8 and 9 year-olds), their fans booed our cheerleaders when they went out on the field for their halftime show. I couldn't believe it - seriously, who boos 8-9 yr-old girls?? I was mortified.
  
  
• In 2004, we hosted the championship games at our field and I was announcing. In the last game of the day (Midget division), the fans of the losing team started really talking smack. I'm not sure if they were upset about the officiating or the way the other was playing or what - I think they were probably just upset about losing and were making excuses. Anyway, word gets back to me that these fans are getting ready to start a fight, so we immediated called the police and had a line of about 8-10 officers lined up right outside the gates. I made several announcements during the fourth quarter that police were present and any inappropriate behavior would result in immediate arrest and incarceration. Thankfully our proactive approach worked, and nothing happened.
  
  
• More than once, although I can't recall a specific date or team involved, I've seen visiting coaches get thrown out (either by the officials or by their own staff) for physically fighting on their own sideline with the OWN fellow coaches (a la Buddy Ryan and Kevin Gilbride). That's just embarrassing and even moreso that I've seen it more than once.
  
  
• In 1992 (before my time, so I didn't actually witness this myself, but I heard all about it), one program that had traditionally been pretty weak, started dominating at the Mitey Mite (8-9 yr olds) level, mostly because of one superstar player who was simply way faster and stronger than everyone else. Since this program had been a doormat for so long, they relished running up the score on their opponents. Anyway, after humiliating one of the traditional powerhouses (from a more affluent area), a group of parents from that organization hired a private investigator to tail the superstar kid. It turned out that he was a 15 year old high school student. That's right - a 15 year old high schooler playing against 8 & 9 year old 3rd & 4th graders. I can only imagine the faces of the league officials when they first saw the photos of this kid walking in and out of his high school. They're just lucky that no one got hurt or a lot of people would have gotten sued. Sheesh.
  
  
• I forget the year (late 90s/early 2000s), in the championship game (Jr. Midget division, I think), one team hadn't lost a game in over 2 years (having won the Pee Wee and Jr. Pee Wee championships the previous 2 years), but lost the championship game in a close, hard fought contest. So, during the award ceremony, while the champions are getting their trophy & medallions, the coach for the losing team (who are all crying), is yelling to his players, "We're still 34-1 over past 3 years. It doens't matter, we're still 34-1!!" On and on he went yelling, basically spoiling what should have been a special moment for the champions.

Of course, there were plenty of incidents with the parents chanting inappropriate things in the stands (singing the "Goodbye" song in the 4th quarter, etc) or players making inappropriate gestures, dances, etc, or parents/coaches falsifying documents to use illegal players, etc., but those listed above were the ones that really stood out.

Dave,

Over the years I have seen and been a part of some horrible incidents. Three really stand out.

1982- We had a great team loaded with some very talented players. We were undefeated and facing another undefeated team who was known for poor sportsmanship. All week we had told our players to be disciplined and keep their heads. We had given them specific instructions, if you get punched put your arms in the air and run to our sidelines the refs will handle it. Well in the third quarter we were winning 40something to zip, and the other teams center and guard started punching and kicking our nose guard. Angelo did just what he was coached to do and ran off the field. The next thing we know a melee broke out. Both sidelines emptied, and we as coaches ran out to break it up. In the midst of the melee a parent from the other team ran into the pile swinging the down box. Dave, I 'm sure you remember those old metal down markers. One of our coaches actually knocked the guy down and held him on the ground. There were no cell phones then so the police weren't called. Leaving the field fans and players from the other team threw rocks and bottles at us. Luckily we escaped with no injuries. Players from both sides were suspended. The parent with the down marker was banned for life. The other team had to play the rest of their schedule as away games.

1987- We were going to play a night game, a rarity back then. The team were going to play was from a great origination, and always good sportsmen. In the third quarter our cheerleaders got in to an altercation, not with the other cheerleaders or fans. Instead it was with some kind of gang the saw the lights and wondered into the park. Things kept getting uglier by the moment. Early 4th quarter the officials fearing this would become violent called the game. We gathered both teams at the center of the field, put our cheerleaders in two lines flanked by our team helmets on, then our opponents flanked our team. We walked to our buses under a hail of bottles and cans, when we got to our buses every window had been broken out.

1992- Our biggest rival for the last 7 years was coached by a great friend. Every year there was one week a year we didn't speak, Game week. Both teams were 8-0 and there was much banter back and forth all good spirited. Our team came out on fire and was playing well. We seemed to be overwhelming our rivals but the play on both sides was clean. In the stands there was several 18-20 year old fans of our rivals who had been drinking beer. They thought it was funny to spit at our players anytime a play came near the fence. A mother from our rivals asked them politely to stop. There reaction was to jeer and spew profanity. I knew it was Brooklyn, still this wasn't going to be tolerated. One of our fathers came out the stands and just tried to settle things down. One of the young fans took a swing at him, next thing there was a full out brawl. Our team and our rivals were locked on the field, several players from both sides tried climbing the fence but the coaches stopped that. Police were called in, several people were arrested. My friend and I were both embarrassed, Neither side had any players involved and both teams met at midfield and had a handshake.

We came up one game short of making the playoffs, turns out that one team that beat us was using older players. They wont be in our league this year as a result but we couldnt get that game changed to a win and they were allowed to play in the playoffs. I was irate when the director told me this.

My horror story was having a severe lack of support from the parents who wouldnt bring their kids to practice if their fav tv show was on it seemed yet on Sat they expected nothing short of domination. I got complaints about our small playbook, well if little johnny could come to practice we would have more than 4 plays. He hardly knows the ones we do.

Here's one you might use Dave? During the last season I ran our local youth program, we had enough younger guys helping coach the teams, to where I could step down as a HC and spent the majority of the season prepping the field before the games,repairing equipment, just generally assisting where needed but more importantly to this thread = officiating all the home games for all our teams full time now......we basically played in a 4 county league vs some of the same community's our HS team played....in other words.....very intense rivalry.....no love lost.....many of the younger coach's on these teams were former players of the different schools, who'd played against each other in HS......so were super competitive with each other......anyway, this was the backdrop for the story......I'm not a native to this area and was a lot older, so am naturally a little more laid back, when it comes to youth football games and their importance in the grand scheme of things, lol.....anyhow....I'm officiating this 11-13 age group game between one of our teams and one from another county(home game).....my buddy who usually helped me do the games, couldn't make it, now I need a replacement.....I get the chain crew organized and find a semi- intelligent senior HS football player, to help me.....I don't give him a flag, but I did give him a whistle and told him="just help me spot the ball on your side of the field and blow the play dead, when the kid is down or out of bounds on your side"......"I'll take care of the rest, OK!".....the kid nods "yes sir"......so we're doing great.....its an exciting game with both teams alternately scoring ocassionally on each other.....not many penalties....good clean game.....my helper is doing great.....good spots....blows the whistle in a timely fashion........so we get to the middle of the 3rd qtr......the score is like 18 all, tie game.....the visitors are driving around the home teams 35-40 yd line.....they run a little toss sweep towards my helpers side of the field.....I rotate over in the backfield to get a better look at the play.....the ball carrier gets hit by a couple would be tacklers.....still stuggling forward, pumping his legs.....a 3rd kid on the defense, swoops in there, rips the ball out and takes off to the opposite endzone.......meantime, the HS kid helping me, has forgotten to take the whistle out of his mouth and the thing starts chirping like a mockingbird, at some point after the kid strips the ball, so the rest of the kids stop, cause they hear the whistle.....the kid who stripped the ball makes it into the end zone amidst cheers from the home fans......naturally, I see the whole thing like it happened in slow motion.....so wave the TD off first.....this sends the coach of our team out screaming at me.......then I give his team the ball, at the point after the strip, when my helper blew the inadvertent whistle.....this brings out the other coach, screaming at me......so we have a conference, so I can explain the call and tell them what happened on the play.....meantime, one of the assts. on the visitors team sends his offense back out on the field, so we have both offense's on the field, thinking they both have the ball......after a quick explanation to the HC's, my young coach finally calms down and is satisfied to just have the ball.....the other young coach rants and stomps off the field, inciting the crowd.....now I have an entire visiting crowd, team and coach's screaming obscenities at me.....with some of my own coach's still mumbling "something", about the called back TD.....so I spot the ball, indicate 1st and ten, for our local team and send the other teams offense off the field(hopefully the proper call?) .....next thing I know, the angry young HC of the visiting team is leading his team off the field, heading to the bus, with an angry heckling crowd of fans trailing behind......so I walk over to him and tell him...."C'mon Nate, its the friggin 3rd qtr.....whether you agree with the call or not, theres plenty of game left, whats the deal?"......well Nate isn't talking to me now....he just says "F" you or words to that effect, lol.... ..So, everyone is busy leaving the field and I'm cleaning up, picking up yardage markers and chains and stuff.....I cut the lights out and head to my truck, really disappointed about the entire situation and kinda wondering "what the heck am I doing wasting my time away from my family, trying to do something constructive with these crazy people?"..... ...well before I have time to feel too sorry for myself, up walks young Nate.....They've flooded out their bus and the battery's dead now and he wants to know if I have jumper cables and can help them get it started......I'll be darned.....todays your lucky day Nate.....not only do I have jumper cables and a truck.....I'm a mechanic too....lol....I guess he didn't know this before?.....Anyway, I get my truck, hook up the cables....wade thru the crowd(who are totally silent now by the way) get in the bus.....hold the gas pedal to the floor, to clear the flooded engine.....start it up for them and send them on their merry way home (45 miles away).....can't remember if anyone said thank you?.....maybe the driver, lol I'm sure there's a moral to this story somewhere, I just don't know what it is right off. ;D

Y'know, Dave, hearing LOS's story (great story, BTW), it occured to me that you'll probably get better material if you talk to some officials rather than coaches. Have you tried posting your question on the Federation Official's Forum? I just checked and I didn't see anything. Ask over there and I'm sure you'll get some great stories (yes, they're mostly HS officials, but a lot of them still do youth games and almost all of them did youth games at some point.). Here's a link to the forum: www.nfhs.org/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=forum;f=9

OK guys, good stories, but again:
All I'm looking for are bad interaction with ref stories

LOS- good one
You're asking for problems with 2 refs and without paid HS game refs IMO - it's what we use. Local guys and 2 wouldnt fly here at all.

All playoff and importand games have 4 refs in our league- all HS game ref guys.

We may have a winner, got a very interesting Florida youth football story through an e-mail. Ive verified it through 1 source, verifying a second source now. When I get the final OK, will post it, it's a doozy. Police, death threats, expulsions, the works

So outlandish I HAVE to make sure it's true- working on that.

I am very interested to find out if you verified this story...

Crazy things happen down here in Florida, and just when I think I have seen it all...something else happens...

Without knowing any of the facts, or any of the participants... I will assume it's true.