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Post by davecisar on May 4, 2009 8:32:49 GMT -6
Hats off to you guys, I dont know how you do it long term Ive coached in the suburbs and now rural area Those guys have NO CLUE how tough it is to coach in the inner-city, YOu are more social worker than coach and it can be emotionally draining and frustrating. The late night phone calls ( Johhnys in jail, Jerome brought a gun home today etc) Taking 10 kids to every game Kids with no food on the weekends Kids whose parent is living in a shelter or in jail, living with tired and worn out grandma AWOL parents/guardians Loser peers trying to make sure no one succeeds, crawfish in a boiling pot syndrome No phone Constant moves No dads in the home (70+%) Little parental/peer respect for getting an education and excelling Jerry Springer show like sidelines After 8 years of coaching there the distance we now live (90 miles) is too far to make it work. Part of me misses it, but part of me doesnt One of my former players beat his dad to death last week, he was on my first inner-city team as a 7 year old and his sis was a cheerleader. WHen I moved out west I used to stop and pick him up every day to go to practice ( he had moved 12 miles from the practice field and was kinda on my way) Horrific deal> www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30487419/BTW he was one of my few kids on that team to have both parents in the home and was doing well in school. Have no idea where it all went downhill. |
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Post by bigdog2003 on May 4, 2009 9:08:02 GMT -6
The baseball team I am coaching now has many of those problems. We only have 10 kids on the team, because two of the players that were on the team before I took over jumped and robbed some kid after school.
The parents didn't come to the parents meeting I had, and won't return my calls. One parent drops all 6 of her kids off at practice with her one son that is on the team. The kids are good for the most part, but they have no discipline at all.
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Post by casec11 on May 4, 2009 9:32:05 GMT -6
The program I am involved with has a mixed group some inner-city low economic area and some the very opposite high economic with a lot in between. It makes it worth it when you get even one to head in the right direction.
Many of these kids need positive role models which is why recruiting good people and coaches to be involved in these programs is so important.
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Post by davecisar on May 4, 2009 15:40:34 GMT -6
We had kids that were with us for 5 years and not once did they drop a kid off or come to a game
I had one game 24 kids on the team, we had 2 fans, not enough for a chain gang
We were directly accrosss the street from the largest and most dangerous public housing project in the city
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Post by tiger46 on May 6, 2009 8:32:21 GMT -6
Hats off to you guys, I dont know how you do it long term Ive coached in the suburbs and now rural area Those guys have NO CLUE how tough it is to coach in the inner-city, YOu are more social worker than coach and it can be emotionally draining and frustrating. The late night phone calls ( Johhnys in jail, Jerome brought a gun home today etc) Taking 10 kids to every game Kids with no food on the weekends Kids whose parent is living in a shelter or in jail, living with tired and worn out grandma AWOL parents/guardians Loser peers trying to make sure no one succeeds, crawfish in a boiling pot syndrome No phone Constant moves No dads in the home (70+%) Little parental/peer respect for getting an education and excelling Jerry Springer show like sidelines Yep. Just add in Katrina victims; remove the phonecalls and, you described my coaching environment for the last 3yrs. Almost no one actually calls us except for the one mom who wanted us to tell the police that her son was at football practice instead of where he actually was- vandalizing someone's property and starting a fight with their children.  |
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Post by casec11 on May 6, 2009 9:34:49 GMT -6
What really pisses you off is when you drop a kid off because he needed a ride and there are 3 cars in the driveway.... but you have never met or seen anyone from their family around, all season.
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Post by davecisar on May 6, 2009 10:21:04 GMT -6
What makes me a bit uptight:
We charge zero to play, we have raffle tickets. Dad has MUCH nicer vehicle than I do, with all the bells and whistles, vanity plates etc son comes up empty on raffle ticket sales, dad wont buy any
One kid I pick him up at his house for the game, as we get 4 blocks from the game field, I notice the dads van driving in front of us. Johnny isnt that your dad? - YEs
I turn left to go to the field, he turns right, to go to the bar. Kid you not, the dad didnt attend a game in 5 years and the kids was great, good student also
Yeah I got nothing better to do than pick up your son for practice and games with my own kids sitting at home without dad there.
It's frustrating but not about the imbicile parents, about trying to raise up kids so they dont turn into those same kind of ( need neutering) parents.
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Post by bigdog2003 on May 6, 2009 19:16:09 GMT -6
I called parents last night to let them know we had to call off practice, and one mom said her son didn't play baseball. I said is your son so and so and do you live at so and so, yeah, well then he plays on my team and has been at every practice.
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Post by Deleted on May 6, 2009 19:41:09 GMT -6
Hats off to you guys, I dont know how you do it long term Ive coached in the suburbs and now rural area Those guys have NO CLUE how tough it is to coach in the inner-city, YOu are more social worker than coach and it can be emotionally draining and frustrating. The late night phone calls ( Johhnys in jail, Jerome brought a gun home today etc) Taking 10 kids to every game Kids with no food on the weekends Kids whose parent is living in a shelter or in jail, living with tired and worn out grandma AWOL parents/guardians Loser peers trying to make sure no one succeeds, crawfish in a boiling pot syndrome No phone Constant moves No dads in the home (70+%) Little parental/peer respect for getting an education and excelling Jerry Springer show like sidelines After 8 years of coaching there the distance we now live (90 miles) is too far to make it work. Part of me misses it, but part of me doesnt One of my former players beat his dad to death last week, he was on my first inner-city team as a 7 year old and his sis was a cheerleader. WHen I moved out west I used to stop and pick him up every day to go to practice ( he had moved 12 miles from the practice field and was kinda on my way) Horrific deal> www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30487419/BTW he was one of my few kids on that team to have both parents in the home and was doing well in school. Have no idea where it all went downhill. thanks Dave...sorry to see that , but sometimes nothing we do can change people, but god knows we try. |
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Post by coachguy83 on May 17, 2009 19:34:18 GMT -6
I live in a town that only has 12,000 people and we still run into a lot of the same problems. We play in a league where we have to travel to a town about 20 miles away for some of our games. Last year I was in bed thinking about getting up to go set up the field in our town when my doorbell rings at 8 AM. I go down stairs and find one of our players standing there asking me if he can have a ride to the game. The player played on our 7th and 8th grade team that didn't play until 3 and he didn't want to miss it. I don't think I ever saw that kids parents, even at our awards dinner. He was dedicated, his parents weren't.
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Post by raiderpirates on Jun 1, 2009 21:50:46 GMT -6
My best ever player did time recently, hate seeing it. Breaking up fights is the worst thing. I never told you about the time a team got in the van I used to drive and took it for a spin the parking lot(ignition was loose and would start without a key) did I? Grade school driveby!
You really appreciate the parents who do try and help that much more. League moms are golden!
As for the players, you can find individuals from that background and make them leaders and they will line the other kids out and make the team become coachable. Your best leaders come from there, they lead by example first and become vocal when necessary.
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Post by casec11 on Jun 2, 2009 8:10:48 GMT -6
two seasons ago I had a kid take two busses just to get to practice, his older sister was usually with him, but I never met his parents. He only missed 1 practice and was there early every day... Usually I would drive them home to a real rough part of the city.
great kid and great player too, but was very quiet.
He should be starting High School next year, I think I will give him a call and see how he's doing.
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Post by oregoncoach on Jun 2, 2009 12:17:06 GMT -6
We dont have any of these issues and I hope I have a different outlook on our typical "problems" this year after reading these posts.
Thank you for sharing.
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