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Post by justwingit on Jul 23, 2007 12:08:33 GMT -6
My thread about shaking hands after a game got lost! Wonder what I did this time!
I didn't shake hands this year with a coach who I thought left in his superstar to get more yards. He ended up scoring his fifth touchdown against our JV to make it 52-0. I thought it was bush league then and I still do.
I guess a logical response is that my team needed to get better.
I can't remember what pro coach never shook hands after ballgames - maybe Stram maybe Brown maybe george allen--- made sure the other coach knew it about before the game. I think their rationale was that one coach was going to mad/depressed/upset/frustrated about the game no matter who won.
I don't agree with that and 155 times out of 158 I have shook hands after the game.
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Post by wingman on Jul 23, 2007 13:04:18 GMT -6
To each his own. Even if I think a coach is being unsportsmanlike and running up score, I'll shake hands. I do think it's our job to get better, and 'running it up ' is subjective. We've had people bitch about a jv lber running back an interception for a score. Nothing worse than someone who is getting killed and throws every down unless they also don't complain about th esacks, fumbles, intercepts etc that go with that. If we're getting rocked, believe me that game will be as short as possible.
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Post by fbdoc on Jul 23, 2007 13:21:30 GMT -6
Win or lose, we always have our players take their helmet off, look the other team in the eye, and say "Good Game." We also have some traditional opponents who will circle up with us for a combined team post-game prayer. As far as coach to coach, we try to stick with the same Nice game or good luck next week - it also depends on the team. There are some coaches I know and we always say something nice to each other. There are others that just get a handshake. On the few occasions where a team has run it up on us - as opposed to us just playing like crap - I've just given the coach a shake of the head. The end of the game is not the time for me to snap off a one liner or smack him in the face Neither one will do anything good for my team.
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Post by larrymoe on Jul 23, 2007 14:11:47 GMT -6
I always make it a point to shake ever opposing kid's hand and say good game, good job or something more personalized if they were outstanding in the game. I don't like to skip that to just meet the coaches at midfield. I think it's classless to not actually shake the guys who played the game's hands.
I've only not shaken hands with another coach once. We were losing by 30+ pts (which I didn't have a problem with, we only took 14 kids to the fresh game anyway) and had their second string in when one of our kids picks off one of their passes and returns it for a TD. Our kids celebrated because the kid was a team favorite, and frankly, wasn't real good. The other team got ticked off since it was the only score they had allowed up to that point (week 5 or 6) and put their starters in. Not only did they do that, but they started going for two everytime they scored after having kicked it previously. We ended up losing something like 58-6 or something. I simply shook the kids hands and turned and walked away from their coaches.
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Post by wildcat on Jul 23, 2007 14:48:20 GMT -6
To each his own. Even if I think a coach is being unsportsmanlike and running up score, I'll shake hands. I do think it's our job to get better, and 'running it up ' is subjective. We've had people {censored} about a jv lber running back an interception for a score. Nothing worse than someone who is getting killed and throws every down unless they also don't complain about th esacks, fumbles, intercepts etc that go with that. If we're getting rocked, believe me that game will be as short as possible. Hard to feel sorry for guys like that... We had a team around here win a game a few years ago something like 70-6. Turns out that 7 of the TDs were either scored by the defense or by the special teams. IIRC, 3 INTs got taken to the house, 2 fumbles, the opening kickoff, and a punt. The coach of the losing team just kept throwing the ball and that's how things got out of hand. I want to say that every offensive possession that team had in the first half ended up with a turnover. In that situation, I would have had no problem in shaking the losing coach's hand because HE was the guy that made the debacle possible. It wasn't like I was leaving my starters in and running the score up. If the guy made a big deal about us "running the score up" on them, I would make sure to remind the reporter who was interviewing me after the game about all of the TDs scored by the special teams and the defense.
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Tampa
Sophomore Member
Posts: 211
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Post by Tampa on Jul 23, 2007 14:53:17 GMT -6
I always hate to hear OR say "Good game, Coach" after lopsided scoring games.
If we beat the dickins out of them, I feel condescending when I say it. But, I don't know what else to say so I say "Good game Coach".
After getting the dickins beat out of us, I really feel like saying: "No dammit! it wasn't a good game because we were embarrassingly out-coached and played, and I guarantee it won't be this way when we meet next time so wipe that smug off your face! But I don't, and just say "Good game Coach".
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Post by coachbdud on Jul 23, 2007 15:24:55 GMT -6
Win or lose, we always have our players take their helmet off, look the other team in the eye, and say "Good Game." We also have some traditional opponents who will circle up with us for a combined team post-game prayer. As far as coach to coach, we try to stick with the same Nice game or good luck next week - it also depends on the team. There are some coaches I know and we always say something nice to each other. There are others that just get a handshake. On the few occasions where a team has run it up on us - as opposed to us just playing like crap - I've just given the coach a shake of the head. The end of the game is not the time for me to snap off a one liner or smack him in the face Neither one will do anything good for my team. you take your helmets off??? every game i have ever been apart of or seen players always keep their helmets on during hand shaking
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Post by fbdoc on Jul 23, 2007 15:47:44 GMT -6
My college coach told us, "Don't hide in your helmet! Take it off and look them in the eye!" We also weren't very good... It's just something that stuck with me. I know this isn't for everybody - about 1/4 of the teams we play will also take their hats off.
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Post by kcbazooka on Jul 24, 2007 5:06:31 GMT -6
One school I was at, our kids had to keep their helmets on. In one game in the past, a player was coldcocked by an opponent. The opponent swung his helmet and hit the kid in the face breaking his cheekbone. I had heard the police actually stopped the other teams bus and were considering taking the miscreant to jail before cooler heads prevailed. Kind of a big story around here because the opponents were in the playoffs. A court case to get the kid kicked out of the playoffs and the counter cases to get him back on the team...
well, i made a short story long -- but thats why we were told by school rule to keep our helmets on during the postgame handsahke.
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Post by lochness on Jul 24, 2007 6:12:53 GMT -6
The most odd thing that had ever happened to me:
We were 2-2 going into a game against an 0-4 opponent. Now, understand that we play a 10-game schedule, so it's not like these guys were looking at a winless season for certain or anything. Anyway, we beat them 26-7. Not exactly a "run up the score" issue. We scored our last TD in the first 2 minutes of the 4th quarter, and then played our backups the rest of the way, so it's not like we punched an extra (and unnecessary) one in at the end of the game either. There wasn't a single unsportsman-like moment from either team (no flags, no incidents), and there is no rivalry or previous incidents between the two schools.
Here's what happened at the end of the game: The kids are all shaking hands. Our staff goes looking for their staff (usually we shake hands with the opponent's coaches separately, and then jump in line and shake with the kids too.) We can't find their staff anywhere, so we figure maybe they're in the players line. So, we jump in. No coaches at the end of the players line. We look over, and their entire staff is just sitting on the visitor's bench looking dejected. So, we stood there for a second looking at them, and they didn't even acknowledge us. So finally, I walked in close and shook each one of their hands while they sat on the bench. I don't think half of them even said anything or even looked us in the eye. It was bizarre.
We also won the state sportsmanship award that year.
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Post by Yash on Jul 24, 2007 13:05:02 GMT -6
No matter how bitter you are, i think you gotta shake hands with the coach. There is always going to be a time when you think the score might have gotten run up on you, or a time when the opponent thinks you did it to them. You still have to be a man about it and send a good message to the kids that its not right to show poor sportsmanship. No matter how you feel, save it for the coaches office.
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Post by fort on Jul 24, 2007 15:28:18 GMT -6
I think there are circumstances where I wouldn't fault someone for not shaking another coach's hand after a game, but personally, I'll shake his hand if not for the only reason of setting a good example for the kids. It's a perfect situation for setting a great example of sportsmanship. If you can look a guy in the eye and shake his hand after he kicked you while you were down (or whatever it may be), that sends a powerful message, IMO.
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Post by phantom on Jul 24, 2007 16:04:24 GMT -6
We've had it run up on us but you still shake hands. There have been a handful of times when we haven't had the kids shake hands and they were all cases where the game got nasty with fights, taunting, and threats. Discretion is the better part of valor sometimes.
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Post by coachcb on Jul 24, 2007 16:13:52 GMT -6
The only time we haven't had our kids shake hands has been when there's been a lot of fights or unsportsmanlike (on both side) between the teams.
Even then, we've run over to the opposing coaches, shook their hands and explained why we're the kids aren't going to shake hands.
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Post by coachmacplains on Jul 24, 2007 22:41:32 GMT -6
Had a situation where an opposing DL gave our FB an MCL sprain by cranking on his knees after a play was over. (Not caught by officials but plain as day, especially on film.) I shook the kid's hand afterward, but I couldn't tell him "good game". I've wondered if I did the right thing there, but I think it would have been a kind of endorsement of the way he plays...which I do not. And I can assure you, if one of my players did that, he would not hear a "good game" from me.
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Post by groundchuck on Jul 25, 2007 6:21:38 GMT -6
I always have the kids keep thier helmets on during the handshake. I guess I am old school b/c when you are "on the field" your helmet is on regardless of why you are on the field. He even keep them on for the coin toss. We will always be gentlemen and shake hands after the game. I don't care what the score was, or the outcome. Be classy, even if the other team isn't.
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Post by coachbw on Jul 25, 2007 7:11:08 GMT -6
I did it once this year. The opposing coach has a reputation in the area. His team took our end of the field for warmups to start the second have. I have seen teams do that before games, but after halftime you know where you should know where to go. They also through a halfback pass late in the game up by 30+. Looking back though, I regret not shaking his hand. It wasn't modeling good behavior for the kids, and has created a negative relationship with an opposing staff that didn't need to be there.
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Post by airman on Jul 25, 2007 7:21:04 GMT -6
I think not shaking hands when you lose or on the end of a lopside lost shows lack of discipline. it takes discipline to control your emotions.
I have always said, if i get angery, it is my fault because I have the choice to be angery or not.
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CoachJ
Junior Member
Posts: 307
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Post by CoachJ on Jul 25, 2007 11:05:22 GMT -6
I have only had one situation where I didn't shake an opposing coaches hands.
We played in a game where they were obviously bigger and better than us. No problem there. They won the game 47-0. No problem there. They didn't substitute the entire game, other than for tired. I think they had 30 on their roster and at least 10 of their players never got in the game.
In the 4th Quarter, up 34-0 they threw a fade/bomb for a TD. It was about a 60 yard play. My tallest corner on the team was 5-8 and their WR was 6-6. Not an ideal matchup. They stuffed on our drive and then came back with another fade for a TD. Same matchup, our guy played it well, but the other guy went up and got it. On their last drive of the game, they threw 4 fades. Luckily for us they will all slightly overthrown or it would have been 54-0.
I shook every kid on their teams hands. I told the 6-6 WR that he is a great football player and their QB was great and I told him so. I didn't make a big deal or say anything to the coach. When I shook the last player's hand I simply walked away and kept my mouth shut. The oppossing coach chased after me cursing and calling me names because I wouldn't shake his hands. He offered to "take care of it in the parking lot." Two of his coaching staff pulled him away from me, but I never even turned around to acknowledge his existence. As they pulled him away, he was still cursing me and trying to goad me into a fight.
I calmly explained to my kids that there is never a time when they don't shake hands. I explained that I didn't agree with the way that the coaches coached the game, but that they need to respect that the kids were just giving effort and following the coaches directions, just as they would follow my directions.
I regret the example I set for the kids that day by not shaking hands, but I don't believe this person's actions should not get any type of response. I will not shake hands with a coach I do not respect and I didn't respect this guy. In my mind shaking his hand is akin to condoning his behavior.
Was I right? I don't know. In my younger days (college) I might have slugged someone cursing me and trying to get in my face, but my maturity has allowed me to walk away.
I probably wasn't my best moment.
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Post by larrymoe on Jul 25, 2007 12:41:37 GMT -6
I think you handled it extremely well. I don't really understand what the big deal is about shaking hands in the first place. It's not like if your a classless piece of crap the entire game, you walking through a line and shaking other people's hands is going to change that.
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Post by wingman on Jul 25, 2007 13:09:09 GMT -6
"Cooler heads prevailed"?? I'd say clueless heads prevailed. If my guy hit an opponent in the face with a helmet after a game, I'd stop the bus and turn him in. He shouldn't be representing us.
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Post by coachcathey on Jul 25, 2007 20:23:09 GMT -6
I had a situation where a coach was a word I can't use on the board. :-) Coached against him in baseball and football, we were not very good in either.
Played them in football and the aforementioned coach was in charge of special teams and offense. Well 3rd quarter, the game has been kinda chippy, both sides had tempers flaring. They end up scoring middle of the 4th and puting the game away like 27-0, after the PAT they made an onside kick and recovered it and threw the ball on all 4 downs (posts and fades), they didn't score but you saw the coaches on the sideline laughing about it.
I shook the kids hands and the coach that was laughing came running up to me, laughing and carrying on, I told him a few choice words and that wasn't the way the game is played, I told him I wouldn't shake an a$$es hand, when they were trying to embarace us on our field. Things got heated and some coaches had to seperate us, one of our coaches told him if he knew what was good for him he should shut up before he let me go.
I knew some of the other coaches they came up after the situation and talked to me off of the field. I told them pretty much, that was classless. They agreed, the head coach called on Monday and aplologized.
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Post by dubber on Jul 25, 2007 20:33:29 GMT -6
We've had it run up on us but you still shake hands. There have been a handful of times when we haven't had the kids shake hands and they were all cases where the game got nasty with fights, taunting, and threats. Discretion is the better part of valor sometimes. Had to break up a post game scrum one time.............could've gotten worse, wise words phantom of course, it was their fault
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Post by davecisar on Jul 26, 2007 3:53:27 GMT -6
Only once did I have a bit of a problem with it. The other team had beaten us soundly 46-6 and were still throwing the ball deep on their last drive. No one can stand this coach. I still walk our kids through the line and shake. The next year, tables are reversed, up 46-0 in 3rd quarter we let off the gas and win 46-12 and beaten them soundly the last 3 years as well, but more competitive games. Most people are moved by your example over time, not words. This same coach is scouting us 2 years later, from a safe distance, so I invite him down to our sidelines and buddy up to him. Now we are friends, exchange scouting info, jab each other and he is my biggest defender up here. Now he is my mechanic etc. Surprising how many bees you can catch with honey LOL. Lot more fun coaching on friendly rather than adersarial terms His teams are really well coached and we love playing them.
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wccoach
Sophomore Member
Posts: 159
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Post by wccoach on Jul 26, 2007 9:45:51 GMT -6
I always shake the hands of the opposing coach staff after a high school football game. Our teams have been on the losing end of some big time whippings from Larger schools that were obviously padding the stat sheets. But, I have never been that upset with the other coaches because our team was not up to the level of them. I have always tried to coach our teams to have enough discipline to control our negative emotions. My big thing has been not giving the opposing team the power to determine my outlook. I find it very hard to coach when I am getting worked up about the opponents play calling. After some very lopsided losses some of my players have been a little upset with me for meeting with the other team's coaches at midfield and being cordial and congratulating them. My response to them was that as upset as I was about the whipping I was not going to give the other coach the power to control my emotions and how I conduct myself. When we make excuses or let someone else determine our conduct we have let them take away our power to determine our results. I try to make sure our team understands that we cannot let someone else be responsible for our conduct. I have always been like that and my wife says that my "control freak" personality won't let me not have total control of the things I can influence. She might be right, I think I have a problem.
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cls
Junior Member
Posts: 295
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Post by cls on Jul 26, 2007 10:18:16 GMT -6
I think a lot of coaches get all worked up about what they think is another coach running the score up. In the big scheme of things who cares. A lost is a lost. To me they are all embarrasing no matter the score. I, for one, hate when I see the other team put in freshmen who can't tie their own shoe and we still can't move the ball. Now that's embarrasing. Some teams feel they need to work on things in case they need it in the playoffs. I don't fault them for doing that. I know there are different cases everywhere. but as I said it doesn't matter if you lose by 1 or 60 it's still in the books as a lost. Maybe it makes you feel better if you can tell everyone hey we almost got them. Not me. Just my thoughts.
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Post by CoachDaniel on Jul 26, 2007 20:38:14 GMT -6
I would always want to shake the opposing player's hands, let the studs know they impressed you... and remember that players are a reflection of their coach. They didn't call the bomb at the end of the 4th quarter, and if their coach has made them feel it is okay to throw a punch, they'll do it. Otherwise, the coach would find you and explain what happened.
After a game against a coach that is not well liked around here, our now-retired head coach (before I arrived) tracked him across the field after a particularly heated game and 'forced' him to shake his hand. (there were some choice words... but the kids don't have to know that)
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Post by teachcoachwm on Jul 26, 2007 21:52:08 GMT -6
We had a local coach at a large high school in the area that would not allow his team to shake hands after games....this school always had solid, sometimes great football...but they weren't known for being dirty or anything...the HC would always shake with the other staff but he sent the kids in...he said that he just felt sometimes emotions got too raw and he didn't want to be inconsistent, so he would inform the opposing the team before the game that his kids would not shake hands
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Post by voodoocat on Jul 30, 2007 12:31:00 GMT -6
The most odd thing that had ever happened to me: We were 2-2 going into a game against an 0-4 opponent. Now, understand that we play a 10-game schedule, so it's not like these guys were looking at a winless season for certain or anything. Anyway, we beat them 26-7. Not exactly a "run up the score" issue. We scored our last TD in the first 2 minutes of the 4th quarter, and then played our backups the rest of the way, so it's not like we punched an extra (and unnecessary) one in at the end of the game either. There wasn't a single unsportsman-like moment from either team (no flags, no incidents), and there is no rivalry or previous incidents between the two schools. Here's what happened at the end of the game: The kids are all shaking hands. Our staff goes looking for their staff (usually we shake hands with the opponent's coaches separately, and then jump in line and shake with the kids too.) We can't find their staff anywhere, so we figure maybe they're in the players line. So, we jump in. No coaches at the end of the players line. We look over, and their entire staff is just sitting on the visitor's bench looking dejected. So, we stood there for a second looking at them, and they didn't even acknowledge us. So finally, I walked in close and shook each one of their hands while they sat on the bench. I don't think half of them even said anything or even looked us in the eye. It was bizarre. We also won the state sportsmanship award that year. And maybe that's why they were 0-4 before you played them.
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Post by voodoocat on Jul 30, 2007 12:31:32 GMT -6
The most odd thing that had ever happened to me: We were 2-2 going into a game against an 0-4 opponent. Now, understand that we play a 10-game schedule, so it's not like these guys were looking at a winless season for certain or anything. Anyway, we beat them 26-7. Not exactly a "run up the score" issue. We scored our last TD in the first 2 minutes of the 4th quarter, and then played our backups the rest of the way, so it's not like we punched an extra (and unnecessary) one in at the end of the game either. There wasn't a single unsportsman-like moment from either team (no flags, no incidents), and there is no rivalry or previous incidents between the two schools. Here's what happened at the end of the game: The kids are all shaking hands. Our staff goes looking for their staff (usually we shake hands with the opponent's coaches separately, and then jump in line and shake with the kids too.) We can't find their staff anywhere, so we figure maybe they're in the players line. So, we jump in. No coaches at the end of the players line. We look over, and their entire staff is just sitting on the visitor's bench looking dejected. So, we stood there for a second looking at them, and they didn't even acknowledge us. So finally, I walked in close and shook each one of their hands while they sat on the bench. I don't think half of them even said anything or even looked us in the eye. It was bizarre. We also won the state sportsmanship award that year. And maybe that's why they were 0-4 before you played them.
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