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Post by coachkeating33 on Oct 17, 2018 8:51:04 GMT -6
caling kids, "p", using the "f" word, "mfer".....thoughts? your policy with coaches on your staff (hcs, ads).....general thoughts
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Post by rsmith627 on Oct 17, 2018 9:15:52 GMT -6
Not a fan at all. I would NEVER call a kid a p-word out on the field. Maybe with the other coaches behind closed doors, but not ever ever around a kid or teammates.
As far as the f word goes, I've dropped it on the field a few times here and there. I don't do it often, so when I do it brings some meaning. Again though, never directed at a player. We're here to build kids up and make them better, not to put them down.
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Post by carookie on Oct 17, 2018 9:22:10 GMT -6
Explain to the coach that is not quality coaching and how they should actually communicate, maybe they were coached that way and don't know any different (although this should have been done earlier anyhow). If it doesnt improve, then adios. We are at school, this is a school sanctioned activity; would I put up with a teacher or principal saying such things in a classroom?
Outside of that, I view that as bad coaching. Vulgarly insulting someone is probably not the best way to get them to improve. As if some kid is gonna say, "wow, coach called me a MFer, I guess I will catch that pass now." Either the coach has no self control, no ability to communicate appropriately, or mistakenly thinks that this is how you are to coach. If it is the latter then hopefully your redirection improves things; if it is one of the first two then you probably don't want him around your players/game day sidelines anyways.
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Post by olcoach53 on Oct 17, 2018 9:28:28 GMT -6
I curse too much, I can admit that. What I don't do is curse TOWARDS kids or insult them. Any coach that would flat out call kids those names has no business coaching at any level.
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Post by nstanley on Oct 17, 2018 9:50:02 GMT -6
caling kids, "p", using the "f" word, "mfer".....thoughts? your policy with coaches on your staff (hcs, ads).....general thoughts I wrote a blog post about this recently because I had some coaches whose behavior rather than trying to elicit a desired effect was more about showing everyone how they felt. I tell my coaches that I know there are times where we slip up, or lose control and say something we shouldn't. But cursing is indefensible if I end up in a meeting with a parent and the principal--especially if we are not just cursing in front of kids but at them.
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Post by coachcb on Oct 17, 2018 10:23:03 GMT -6
As a staff, our hard fast rules are a) PG language only, b) no cursing directed AT the kids and c) it cannot be excessive. My personal stance is much more conservative: I avoid swearing as much as possible. Some PG language does come out here and there but it's rare. It's just not productive, it sets a bad precedent for the kids and it's a habit that can cost everyone a penalty in a game.
I will admit, some PG-13 language has flowed pretty freely when something in practice has set me off. For example, we were running a skelly period that was getting a bit chirpy and one of our starting DBs laid a dirty cheap shot on a WR after the whistle was blown. I let the kid have it: I told him that was a bullchit cheap shot and to get the hell off of the field.
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Post by fkaboneyard on Oct 17, 2018 10:30:13 GMT -6
I coach at a conservative Christian school and the school's policy (as well as my own) is to not use profanity. I hear profanity from kids all the time. That said, I slip up sometimes. I noticed awhile back that kids don't respond well to a coach doing it and I lose credibility so I've all but stopped. Your mileage may vary.
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Post by justafbcoach on Oct 17, 2018 10:54:14 GMT -6
I curse too much, I can admit that. What I don't do is curse TOWARDS kids or insult them. Any coach that would flat out call kids those names has no business coaching at any level. I'm in this boat as well. I curse a lot in general, so I do it on the field for sure. But, I've never cursed directly at any player. I wouldn't really want to work with someone who felt like that was the way to get through to kids. I agree that people like that don't really belong out there with kids.
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Post by dubber on Oct 17, 2018 10:58:39 GMT -6
I've gotten really good at the power whisper
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Post by hsrose on Oct 17, 2018 10:59:20 GMT -6
My policy is that if you can't say it in the classroom you can't say it on the field. Been fighting that here for the past couple of seasons but it's finally getting through to the coaches. And yeah, there is a difference between slipping up and it being part of the everyday language pattern.
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Post by Defcord on Oct 17, 2018 11:05:45 GMT -6
Where I am at now if kids cuss on the field they have to do 10 pushupsk, same for the coaches. However, if it is some sort of blatant disrespect then the whole action is taken into account and kids are punished appropriately (would assume the same would apply to coaches but it hasn't happened since I have been here). It's a pretty good policy and even though 10 pushups isn't much it's been enough to keep kids from cussing. I have heard less cussing here than I have in any program that I have been around.
I am not offended by cussing at all but I do think people should be kind and fair to each other. Usually cussing hinders that, but not always. When I coached in college we had two rampant cussers. One of them would cuss kids out in film or in practice after our head coach got on him. It was annoying and surely ineffective. It seemed like a defensive response for passing the buck. The other guy that coached was hilarious or colorful. He used every word possible in every way possible but always as a way to highlight or embellish the point we was trying to make. When he started cussing everyone listened...and laughed hysterically. It worked in college; I am not sure there is a place for it in high school.
I must admit I did slip a damn-it in the other day. We were going over a check and I didn't tell the kids correctly and I was mad at myself for setting it up wrong because I didn't want them to delay when we see the formation in the game. I immediately followed the damn-it with a dang-it for cussing and started doing pushups. The kids only heard the dang-it and were like "wow Coach has some self discipline doing pushups for dang-it." But I admitted my mistake and moved on.
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Post by planck on Oct 17, 2018 11:09:02 GMT -6
I curse too much, I can admit that. What I don't do is curse TOWARDS kids or insult them. Any coach that would flat out call kids those names has no business coaching at any level. Basically. I've never cursed at a kid or called him a name. That's bush league.
I curse to make an emphatic point and leave an indelible memory about what I'm communicating. In my career, I've had more players tell me later that, for example, "I knew job 1 was to turn the ball back to Mike because you made it clear how badly the defense would be {censored} if I didn't." However, cursing just to be amusing or to denigrate people isn't helpful or necessary. Every tool in your toolkit has a purpose.
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Post by nicku on Oct 17, 2018 11:14:53 GMT -6
Most of my on-field cursing is limited to "quit being a jackass" or "Good $hit right there"
Even the office and the booth...way worse, which I'm trying not to do as much.
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Post by joelee on Oct 17, 2018 11:15:17 GMT -6
You can't call kids names and cuss at them directly. What the f are you doing? is light years removed from you are a p---y.
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Post by throwahitch on Oct 17, 2018 11:43:35 GMT -6
I coach at a conservative Christian school and the school's policy (as well as my own) is to not use profanity. I hear profanity from kids all the time. That said, I slip up sometimes. I noticed awhile back that kids don't respond well to a coach doing it and I lose credibility so I've all but stopped. Your mileage may vary. I use mine almost exclusively during practice to break the monotony. We do the same things every day. So sometimes to make the kids laugh I will drop one in a joking setting. Never calling a player names. That gets you nowhere. They won't trust you.
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Post by throwahitch on Oct 17, 2018 11:48:21 GMT -6
I curse too much, I can admit that. What I don't do is curse TOWARDS kids or insult them. Any coach that would flat out call kids those names has no business coaching at any level. Basically. I've never cursed at a kid or called him a name. That's bush league.
I curse to make an emphatic point and leave an indelible memory about what I'm communicating. In my career, I've had more players tell me later that, for example, "I knew job 1 was to turn the ball back to Mike because you made it clear how badly the defense would be {censored} if I didn't." However, cursing just to be amusing or to denigrate people isn't helpful or necessary. Every tool in your toolkit has a purpose.
This^ "If you don't scrape to A gap when you see a pull you have just taken a giant Sh!! on the integrity of our defense" I always use if. Like "If you Pssy foot up into the hole"
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Post by dytmook on Oct 17, 2018 12:00:52 GMT -6
Hips higher than giraffe p*ssy is one that comes out occasionally when a linemen goes for a ride
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Post by Hitch & Pitch on Oct 17, 2018 12:18:43 GMT -6
I learned a long while ago there is a fine line between coaching and bitching.
I heard an analogy before, when you teach a young man how to tie his shoe, would you yell at him, call him a motherfing p---y, then why do you do it when you are trying to teach the same kid how to play football???
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Post by coachd5085 on Oct 18, 2018 5:41:07 GMT -6
On a side note, as an extra curricular activity, should a parent decide to complain/take action against a coach for using profanity, even in the most docile manners described in the posts above, I don't think the coach would have a leg to stand on. Regardless of anyone's individual opinion on it, the "come on, it's football" mindset would probably not hold up well in 2018
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Post by planck on Oct 18, 2018 5:52:12 GMT -6
I laughed, because in Iowa everyone is short of competent coaches. They created an endorsement that requires coursework, cost, and maintenance so they're are virtually no volunteer coaches.
So, yeah, they'd fire you, but you'd better be abusive or bad at your job.
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OleCoach
Freshmen Member
Be a motivator, not a Ra-Ra guy.........
Posts: 40
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Post by OleCoach on Oct 18, 2018 6:11:52 GMT -6
I was told by an old coach that you will find trouble when you add the pronoun you to the explicit sentence.
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Post by kcbazooka on Oct 18, 2018 6:17:35 GMT -6
Cussing is OK in coaching. Haven't you ever watched Last Chance U or Friday Night Tykes? ? If an assistant coach was using profanity excessively I'd can his *#@$(!* ^*&
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Post by CS on Oct 18, 2018 7:04:48 GMT -6
Define "Excessive"
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Post by coachkeating33 on Oct 18, 2018 9:05:59 GMT -6
" ok get on the line. ..we are fuking running you puss#s.....we just fukin didnt work at all in the weight you you motherfukers..you guys are fukin pussys....our qb gets late hit in the {censored} game and you {censored} do nothing...i would have kicked someone in the {censored} nuts.....{censored} {censored}...we are going to keep {censored} running...and if you dont like the way im {censored} talking you mother {censored} can go ton the superintendent and have me reomved....."
something along those lines I see as excessive...others may not
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Post by planck on Oct 18, 2018 9:07:55 GMT -6
I'd say nobody is such a bad coach that they act that abusive, but I've seen Last Chance U, so...
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Post by carookie on Oct 18, 2018 9:40:10 GMT -6
On a side note, as an extra curricular activity, should a parent decide to complain/take action against a coach for using profanity, even in the most docile manners described in the posts above, I don't think the coach would have a leg to stand on. Regardless of anyone's individual opinion on it, the "come on, it's football" mindset would probably not hold up well in 2018 EXACTLY, I've had coaches get real philosophical in defense of using vulgarity "words are only bad if we allow them to be", "how is it any different than other words", "blah blah blah". And while they may be right, here is the thing- we live in a society that deems them vulgar; and we have to play by that societies rules. If your goal in life is to make a big societal change to make cursing more acceptable fine, but go fight that somewhere else. Otherwise play by societies rules.
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Post by fkaboneyard on Oct 18, 2018 10:00:06 GMT -6
During summer at the end of practice when everybody was circled up our offensive coordinator was giving the end of practice talk. He said something to the effect of, "We need to be focused so that we know our jobs. Our first opponent is big and physical, if we don't know our jobs we'll get our asses handed to us." A freshman kid told his mom that "coach used the 'A' word at practice". The mom came unglued and wanted him fired (which didn't happen). It shouldn't come as a surprise that the kid is an absolute turd and curses more in one practice than an NWA cd on loop.
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Post by planck on Oct 18, 2018 10:02:12 GMT -6
During summer at the end of practice when everybody was circled up our offensive coordinator was giving the end of practice talk. He said something to the effect of, "We need to be focused so that we know our jobs. Our first opponent is big and physical, if we don't know our jobs we'll get our asses handed to us." A freshman kid told his mom that "coach used the 'A' word at practice". The mom came unglued and wanted him fired (which didn't happen). It shouldn't come as a surprise that the kid is an absolute turd and curses more in one practice than an NWA cd on loop. Ugh, {censored} that lady.
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Post by coachkeating33 on Oct 18, 2018 11:05:47 GMT -6
" ok get on the line. ..we are fuking running you puss#s.....we just fukin didnt work at all in the weight you you motherfukers..you guys are fukin pussys....our qb gets late hit in the {censored} game and you {censored} do nothing...i would have kicked someone in the {censored} nuts..... {censored} {censored}...we are going to keep {censored} running...and if you dont like the way im {censored} talking you mother {censored} can go ton the superintendent and have me reomved....." something along those lines I see as excessive...others may not this reallly happened....I wont say where or how I know its true but it is
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Post by hunhdisciple on Oct 18, 2018 11:05:50 GMT -6
I use profanity pretty frequently. I think there's a huge difference in using it when talking to someone, and using it towards someone.
Asking the overly lazy kid who didn't block downfield and cost his team points "what the F" he was thinking, is different than just straight saying "F you."
Most of the profanity stuff depends on who hears it. In a post game thing a few years ago, one of the asst talked about how he was glad we "kicked their a$$" and it was in a team circle, and parents and families were involved. It was against his Alma mater where they had previously fired him under shady circumstances. I got it. And 90% of the people around knew that, understood that, and loved it. But, a few people got upset about the harsh language. He apologized for it the next time, but people still loved his speech for it.
You've gotta know your audience with players, parents, and admin. That's just the way it is.
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